Julius Agwu (the Nigerian comedian’s comedian) got me fired up to finally start talking about this topic when I heard him telling a joke at the NTA’s AM Express second anniversary dinner night some weeks ago, about how easy it is to shoot gospel music videos in the East (Igbo land) and how the videos and the music nearly always turn out to be highly substandard. True word! And this substandardness is not helped at all by the fact that many of our songwriters/artist especially those of the non Hip hop and R&B stock just don’t know how to rhyme.

And by the way what do I mean by rhyming in songs? I mean arranging one’s song’s lyrics such that the last word in a line (in Hip hop called “a bar”) has the same sound as the last word in another line, especially the next one. And doing this if you don’t know is the beauty of any poem (most poems sha, cos some don’t rhyme), flow (rap) or song. Especially for songs and rap cos any Tom Dick and Harry can put together a verse talking about his/her feelings but it takes only one with balls (that knows what it takes to be a real musician) to put his verse together with rhymes. Let me put it in another way it’s just the rules from ages past. It’s what shows you have talent. And by cracking one’s brain to discover rhymes and put them so beautifully and smoothly together it builds one’s artistic intellect. So a first step for any aspiring musician is to learn to rhyme once line by line first. With advanced study you’ll probably start rhyming twice line by line. Like Eminem, he’s real good at that.

Check out this single rhyme by Ludacris in the song “Pick up the phone featuring R. Kelly and Tyrese.

Now see I’m just a black man living out a black man’s dream
I went from Popeye’s to eating Flintstone wings
Pouring out alcohol, rolling up green
Playing X-Box on a 100 inch screen

See the single rhymes: dream-wings, green-screen. Now check out these double rhymes. The first from Eminem in his song: “Stan” featuring Dido. And the other from me myself and I: TRAE, in a rap I wrote way back in April 2004 titled: “a pro-50 cry from Sheol”.

I’m sorry I didn’t see you at the show, I musta missed you
Don’t think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But what’s this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit’s just clowning dogg, c’mon – how fucked up is you?

Fuck the Grammys, 50’s loss is so uncanny
Fuck the Grammys; I should have listened to my nanny
I should have blazed some Yanni, cos these fools they hate rap hommies
I was like Hip hops Gandhi, but they left me cold and lonely

Now I’m sure you what’s up when I’m screaming that songwriters should learn to rhyme. That’s why I get pissed off by many songs I hear on our TV stations. Benita Okojie’s recent South South advert song is a good example. Admittedly the video was good and she’s got a nice voice and can sing, but that song had no single rhyme in it and man because of that I hated the song out rightly as a work of art. It’s simple I don’t appreciate songs whose lyrics don’t rhymes. On the other hand I’m all thumbs up for Jeremiah Gyang and Six Foot Plus in their song: Nabaka. It’s in Hausa but the lyrics rhymed even Six’s verse where he rapped. And any Nigerian musician will know that rhyming (let alone ordinarily singing without rhymes) in Vernacular with its limited vocabulary is not easy.

Another category of musicians that deserve knocks are the Igbo gospel and Highlife musicians. Cos they have a total disregard for rhyming, even when singing in English. They just sit their ass down and remix popular Christian songs and praise chants. I’m telling you, there ain’t no contemporary gospel song without an Igbo remix. And the worse part of it all is that their voice is terrible (all through the song they’re just shouting) and the production is of very poor standard. Although there have been a few of their rhymeless songs which were pretty pleasant to the ears. And just in case you’re wondering how I know all this it’s from my University days in the East.

So that’s it, we should learn to rhyme in our songs. Even as far back as in the 1930’s American musical films they rhymed. And we’re here in this modern times doing the opposite. Rhyming is a must if you doubt me do a search for any song’s lyrics you like and you’ll see the rhymes. Infact the only non rhyming American song I now is R. Kelly’s: “Heart of a woman”. Even in “Mosh” a political song by Eminem with so much to talk about he still managed to rhyme.

Oh well, I guess that’s it. Hip hop is dying slowly…but watch me revive it, you know eradicate the wackness. Let me show y’all how to kick a rhyme with my Xmas bars. Props to Modenine. I ain’t spit in like months but feel this:

My Xmas bars
Written 24th December 2004

Christmas in the ghetto just ain’t worth shit
Tell Santa Claus he can suck my dick
Waiting on Santa is like waiting on a bitch
Those words are TRU’s now feel my shit
I’ve been there-done that with like all bitch
I’m shitty but still had some down ass chicks
It’s a pity I’m still looking for my core chick
Like Stella, I’m Jaiye is what I for wish
But through all the stress twas good I had friends
Those like my best and well, some who pretend
Those with my set I could call up by ten
And those who got my back from Mon to weekend
Even on the cyber I did pretty well
Gaining comp info like Billy and Dell
My peoples they’re saying my blog is real swell
So fuck economics on IT I dwell
But still it’s important I cop that degree
Cos being redundant is like a disease
My project I’ll sort out and end laxity
Best later than never how bad can it be
So flexing and repping I’ve stepped up my game
Might not be hot stepping but they’re calling my name
And if OBJ ain’t award me he’s lame
At least the DJ will, TRAEman I remain

Two of Nigeria’s best songwriters/rappers: Six Foot Plus and Modenine, with Wyclef Jean (in the middle) during Wyclef’s show in Nigeria.

Nigeria’s own Enyimba of Aba, holders of CAF Champions League trophy want to win it for a second time, and back to back for that matter. The decisive date is Sunday December 12th. It’s the “D” day for the second leg final. And guess what? It’s holding in Abuja. The Aba stadium was banned due to the poor quality of the pitch. Trust Nigeria and maintenance now.

Truly Enyimba have been trying. Kudos to the boys, the fans, the club management and the Abia State government. They really impressed in the first leg, they played some pretty skillful football. At least much better than in some of their previous matches. And since they scored a goal away (they lost 2-1), a one nil home win would be enough to clinch the cup (the away goal rule in international tournaments). Peeps shouldn’t complain too much of hostility in Tunisia. It’s just the fanaticism and passion of the wonderful game of football. After all we should thank our stars for getting a goal…, which looked offside. Etoile deserved their win sha. No thanks to Obinna Nwaneri’s over busy body, which caused us a penalty for their first goal.

Anyway all that is gone. Fans should look forward to the final and go out and cheer Enyimba in full force. We shouldn’t disgrace Naija. Fans should fill the stadium and show the world we got love for our home teams too. If I’m in town by then u bet I’ll be there.

Enyimba celebrate after scoring a goal in the first leg of the CAF Champions League final 2004 away to Etoile Sahel of Tunisia.

In recent times Nigeria has seen all sorts of international music stars (from DMX, Guru, Naughty by Nature, Wyclef Jean, Sean Paul, Shaggy, Ashanti, Eve, Ginuwine, Usher, to Africa’s own Awilo and the late Brenda Fassie) grace the stage at different shows in the country. And Thursday December 1st was no exception as 50 cent (the beef bringer himself. Check out his line from “You Want Beef With Me?”: You want beef with me Take a number and get in line) performed at the Eagle’s Square in Abuja. He was in the country as the Star Mega Jam’s headliner.

In the company of his G-Unit soldiers: Lloyd banks and Young Buck (seems he’s cleared up his police issue with the Dr Dre attempted stabbing shit. Dre day for life niggaz. Now you know where I got “TRAE days” from…smiles), DJ Whookid and a whole lot of other crew members 50 tore up the stage.

And Praises be to God because I witnessed the show live. Though I entered via the apian way…Ah Oga security sorry oh, my bad my bad, one Nigeria! Through out the show 50 sure was in philanthropic mood (you know Hip hop now: money, power, respect!) as he was giving out stuff like his baseball caps, snickers, towel, singlet, jewelry and 500 and 200 Naira notes. I almost copped some goodies myself. But man the stampede and rush was too much. And that wasn’t good cos handsets went missing and a lot of people, girls especially, lost their footwear. The crowd was just too rowdy and not well behaved. Peeps were throwing shoes up in the air and some even aimed at the stage. I guess they were thugging it out in their own way. And the mic wasn’t too good, but the fact that most peeps knew 50’s songs word for word they followed and it was aight. Over all the crowd felt him and the show was great. I could have told ya more but I missed part of the show when I was getting h**d in the toilets…smiles.

You can also read a review of the Abuja show and the one in Lagos (where he performed some/a day later) at http://www.hiphopworldmagazine.com/features.php?detail=46 . He should have also been in Port Harcourt but he had some silly brawl with Eedris Abdulkareem. You can read on the brawl at http://www.hiphopworldmagazine.com/features.php?detail=46, or checkout Eedris’ site to hear his view on the issue. The brawl sure is making the news right now in Naija. Even soccer forumites are digressing and gisting about it.

50 sure is good at live performances but if you ask me I still prefer DMX. The January show he had in Abuja was off the hook. Unlike 50, “X” was a one-man act, with only his DJ supporting him, but man he carried the crowd. Ain’t nobody stoning or booing him, the crowd wasn’t that rowdy (except for some police over-zealousness as they tried to keep the crowd too far away from the stage), they loved him. Performing verse and chorus after verse and chorus from his numerous hits he had the crowd in a frenzy. You know how it is with DMX’ songs. Being the dogg he is his songs are very energetic and inspiring. They tend to push your adrenalin up. I’ll always respect X for that.

Last word: Why can’t the NTA (Nigerian Television Authority) get the right presenters to interview hip-hop acts. What’s with Augusta Maduegbuna of NTA Saturday night live asking for demonstration from 50 Cent instead of a freestyle. She wanted him to stand up, drop his go shorty hook and dance to it. I’m sure 50 must have been like what the fuck? The same shit happened in DMX’s case. Two elderly Northern presenters at NTA plus; who I’m sure don’t know a thing about hip hop were asking him shit, instead of the right questions fans would want to hear. Young presenters with hip hop knowledge should interview hip hop artist. The old folks better chill and look for their fame in other TV programs

Shit I don’t write (raps that is) much these days. But u can read som’en I put down on 50 from back in the day at http://www.africanhiphop.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=1869&highlight=50+loss+uncanny .

50 Cent with Ayo Animashaun (Publisher of Hiphopworldmagazine, “The Source” of Nigeria)

Maybe now ain’t the very right time to blog on DAAR communication’s television station: AIT (Africa Independent Television) and radio station: Ray Power 100.5. Because they ain’t in the news right now nor am I feeling a 100% passion for the topic as I’m writing right now. But anyway what I’m about to talk about has been on my mind for a long time. So it’s best I spill the beans now or never.

If ever the history of radio and television is written in Nigeria…or specifically Abuja, AIT and Ray Power owned by the energetic entrepreneur: Raymond Dokpesi will certainly be mentioned. Because for real those two media outfits did lots to change the lives of Nigerians for the better information wise. From the recent launching of their new Abuja office, AIT and Ray Power have really come a long way. Ray Power came to Abuja sometime in early 1999 and AIT later in the year. Before then man, Abuja residents didn’t know the meaning of choice. Despite being the nation’s capital, Social life in Abuja was fucked. All we had media wise was a dumb old Radio Nigeria AM station specializing in boring Hausa programs and a socially lifeless NTA Channel 5 Abuja. But with the coming of Ray Power and AIT things changed man, big time…for the better. People now began to enjoy and feel the power of music and enjoy entertainment at a first class level. As a caller once said on a program on Ray Power it was like all of a sudden everyone felt proud owning a radio and wanted to blast his/her’s at the loudest level. With them Abuja residents felt more in touch with happenings in their surroundings. It might sound funny now but the concept of phoning in to a radio/TV program (one you’re really enjoying for that matter) and commenting was new then and turning heads all over. Really if truth be told Ray Power was life in 1999 and early 2000 (that’s before their closure). With the hardworking duo of Kenny (Keke) Ogungbe and Dayo (D1) Adeneye (now managing Kennismusic and PrimeTime Africa, formerly known as PrimeTime Jamz) and their wonderful presenters like Steve the sleek Kadiri, Dennis the Menace, Lola, Obiora Ilo – news department, Mitchell Obi and Ejiro Omonode – sports department, a certain presenter (on Ray Power) with a northern name who used to make we stay awake all Sunday nights to listen to his captivating voice etc Ray Power and AIT was going places. And the Ray Power slogan and boast then of being: “Africa’s numero uno” was truly worth it. Then Hip Hop and R&B in Nigeria was just experiencing a rebirth and Ray Power was at the peak of the progress march. Ask musicians like 2face of the Plantashun Boiz, Eedris Abdulkareem, Tony Tetuila etc and they’ll tell you that they owe a lot to Ray power for the start of their careers.

But now things done change. They went through a lot of difficulties. Difficulties like financial squabbles with the NTA (Nigerian Television Authority) over CAN 2000 broadcasting rights, which they lost and cost them a lot of money, closure for quite sometime in 2000 due to inability to pay up debts owned to banks (at a time they were about going international). Which marked the end of their wonderful era as when they came back they lost some of their best staff and couldn’t quite find their footing again. And the burning of their Abuja office in 2001. But despite all these short comings it’s still good to know they are on their feet today. And are still surviving in the present day choked up Abuja TV and radio environment. Life is a struggle and that of DAAR communication’s AIT and Ray Power has been a tough one. Kudos must be given to them for their strong determination and to their audience for supporting and sticking with them.

AIT’s logo

Yep, I feel sort of nerdy cos I just became a Gmail account holder about a week ago. You sure must have heard of Google the search engine giants. And if you’re geeky or interested enough you must have heard about Gmail. It’s their new email service which is receiving rave reviews from Tech heads and critics. But the thing is that Gmail is not yet accessible to the general public, it’s still in testing mode. So those with the privilege of using the service were all invited to sign up based on their nerdiness: frequent users of Blogger, cyber-technology gurus and friends of Google. The good thing is that once you’re a Gmail account holder you can periodically send out invitations to your friends to sign up too. That’s how I signed up, thanks to kayode Muyibi. I got an extra IV from Chippla, gave that one out though. Well to be honest with you I’m still sticking with my Yahoo email. After checking out the services Gmail offers I’m pretty impressed but not impressed enough to treasure it above my Yahoo email. Their reply system is cool and the navigation from page to page is quite fast but their browser compatibility requirements are stricter than Yahoomail, so you can’t access it easily from all systems. Also they ain’t got no virus scanner for attachments, and font enhancement. Plus I hate the way their emails are displayed when you’re reading it (especially those from other email host like Yahoomail). Let’s just see how things go. At least I got Gmail so when tech nerds are running their mouth I can run mine too. If you want a Gmail invitation let me know…so I can send you one when I’m allowed to do so. That should be soon I hope.

Gmail’s logo