Chicken and beer
Posted by trae_z on January 19th, 2006
Today’s lesson is on chicken and beer. Chickens…chicks…lesbos. Yep, I’m ranting off on homosexuals and drinking.
I’m the last person you’ll see spending money on booze. That is to say I don’t drink. Or more precisely I hardly drink, I do so only socially. And that’s good for me cos I ain’t ever want to see myself addicted to the bottle. But sha I’m kinda getting used to it these days…my friends have being initiating me. You know I gotta be all manly and shit. Some days back we went drinking at one of them garden joints (they’re scattered all over Abuja municipal area council) and after every I got thinking and recognize that when we guys be out drinking we talk a lot of shit; a lot of useless, stupid and silly stuff. It’s like in the economic law of diminishing returns. At first guys meet up to drink once In a while and it’s all fun. Then over time you start to “live to drink”, you’re always gulping down alcohol with your peers. Hanging out over bottles of beer becomes played out, the same old faces, same old dumb minds, same old stupid gist. At that point stuff is being overdone. Me thinks many guys are at this stage. Could we please get a life and move on to other things…don’t you see you’re getting pot bellied?
On the other hand that was a bit too harsh, because for many adults over here considering the social-economic status of the country the beer parlour is their only recreation spot. And some how it’s natural that as boys become men their meeting point changes too from the play ground to the beer parlour. Nevertheless if you’re pro-bottle make sure you’re sipping that drink with the right crew around you and do it in moderation.
We’re through with beer, over to the chicken. My brain did a eureka on me recently, thus I present to you my reproductive organ theory (Keep a straight face and read on!). It simply states that being gay ain’t natural. What are you? A Christian, Muslim, Atheist, whatever. At least you’ll agree with me that the brain(s) behind human life had a reason for giving men a penis and women a vagina. Yuck, this is dirty writing. Henceforth I’m calling them the P and the V. remember I’m not working with spirituality. Just as it’s natural for a woman to breastfeed a baby and a man doing so as would be wrong, it’s also natural for the P to hang out with the V. two V’s hanging out using dildo’s candles and shit or two P’s hanging out hitting each other through the anus is thus crazy…abnormal to say the least! If you’re a farmer looking out for your money and you see your prize bull mounting another bull and not a cow would you say “oh it’s his choice, let him be”? Definitely not, you’ld probably say “that bull is sick in the head”. Therefore under natural law there ain’t no justification for our brothers and sisters being gay. They’re sick in the head straight up. No matter how our minds have being conditioned to look at it as normal it’s not normal.
Being that in Africa homosexuality ain’t a common phenomenon, when I see some of them Western pro-gay stuff I get really baffled. I guess it gets the Nigerian government baffled as well cos they recently started making moves to ban all forms of homosexuality in the country.
Anyways me thinks lesbos probably need a dick whipping and gay dudes probably need to ponder over Tony Tetuila and 2face Idibia’s words: “ogogoro be like woman, if you shack am you go high oh!”
Great combos, props to UNN: okpa and cigar, akara and breast. Another great combo, props to Ludacris: chicken and beer
January 19th, 2006 at 7:58 pm
LOL. “ogogoro be like woman, if you shack am you go high oh!”
January 19th, 2006 at 9:32 pm
I really wont say anything on that topic, but the thing i will always say to people is not to try and judge people based on thier sexuality.
Anyway so it is written in the bible, but it does not bother me, there are more important issues in nigeria that need to be solved and taken care of, than the issue of same sex marriage.
Why arrest them for public displays of affection, for what now, why not arrest people killing people for money and power in that country, why not punish the people who are single handedly destroying the economy of the country, instead of passing harsh sentences on people who have a different sexuality to that written in the bible.
Nice post anyway and loved the ogogoro be like woman!
January 20th, 2006 at 1:39 am
Ol’ boy, I hate to be blunt but you’re talking nonsense.
A civil society is built on letting other people do whatever they want to do as long as it’s not hurting others. That way, *you* too can do what you want to do without someone getting up in your face. We are all different from each other, and that’s OK. Dig?
So, all this talk of “dick whipping” is just a pose, man. And, more to the point, it is degrading to women and, by extension, to men as well.
The real issue here is whether people have the right to do what they want in their own bedrooms without being tortured by the government for it. And the only right answer is “yes”.
And that process starts with sharp young guys like yourself, Trae, educating all the blockheads. We’re counting on you to do it.
Peace.
January 20th, 2006 at 12:06 pm
Booze rocks, yeah when you do it with the right peeps and not overdo it.
Let gays be, but I’m not in support of their modus vivendi, just as u think it’s unnatural!
January 20th, 2006 at 6:14 pm
Trae
I completely endorse Teju’s comments and for reference regarding your comments about animals send the link below
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homosexuality#Homosexuality_in_animals
January 20th, 2006 at 6:32 pm
Stumbled upon your senseless raving about people who like to have depraved sex … we all do in some way, some just push it to the limits. In modern society, there’s no place for homophobia.
January 20th, 2006 at 8:08 pm
Chicken and beer is the lick. and talking of garden joints. In my opinion they are the only joints that are worth going to. definitely were one takes the pulse of the neighbourhood. if the guys there didn’t know and talk about it then it wasnt worth knowing about.
homophobia. loaded word and inappropriate for rush3k to level at this post (kinda like being called anti-semitic for criticising jewish people). on a biological level I agree. but as for the right to exist in everyday society and not be persecuted I wholly agree. all God’s children …
January 22nd, 2006 at 4:27 pm
Trae I’m suprised to find you so simplistically homophobic in your post. At one of the earliest bloggers in Nigeria and with quite a large audience, you have a duty to think before you type.
The idea that homosexuality is not very common in Nigeria speaks of your ignorance on the topic: how do you know what you think you know?
In my experience, Nigerians don’t have a very well refined “gaydar”. Coming from London and a metropolitan existence, its easy for me to spot gay men here. Believe me: there are PLENTY!
So please, don’t become a tool for prejudice and setting Nigeria back a few centuries. There are enuff old men out there doing that already!
January 23rd, 2006 at 5:25 am
It still baffles me what lesbians/gays see in one another. How do gays feel about the heavy masculine breath of their partners? Is there any excitement/ecstacy/enjoyment in sleeping with your own gender apart from your imaginative pleasure? The creator of the world knew what was right for us before giving everyone gender. If not we would have been created hermaphrodites - have the option to have sexual intercourse with any and everyone,or even asexual.
I saw this kinda post on Black looks before, but I couldn’t respond cos I fear beign called names. I see that Africans who live abroad are not only being milked of their abilities/potentials, they are also being brainwashed to accept everything that comes from the white man’s world as good (even their shit)!
For those of us that say it’s a free world, yeah I know it’s a free world. That’s why every arab man can move around western nations freely without their actions/movements being scrutinized or placed under surveillance! That’s why Africans can go to western embassies and can’t obtain visas easily without any hassle?! That’s why blacks are beign encapsulated in specific regions of success by latent forces.
Homosexualism is only prevalent in the West. I have lived in Nigeria a long while and I haven’t seen public knowledge nor many people coming out in the open to say they are homosexuals. It’s not something we see everyday in Africa Jeremy!If they were in African society long time ago, they would have been secret and not openly accepted as they are in the West. Even we as Africans know that there are some parts of our cultures and norms that are not good. Have u ever seen whites say that some parts of their traditions are detrimental? NO! Everything is right with them. Most of these acts ,if not originate, are encouraged and back-patted by the whites.
Yes people are free to do what they want to do, but remember what you do is being copied/seen as a standard by youths upcoming. Public indifference to homosexualism one way or the other encourages these acts to persist and become stronger.
I don’t really care what they do to one another it’s their life. They can even spread blue band (margarine) one each other and place yourselves nicely inside bread and comsume. Na dem pomo be that. But I fear/dread to bear children and hear my kids say they are gays or lesbians (I reject in Jess name!). If we don’t take public stance on it, it will cause pain in the future for us.
Africa has enough problems like hunger,poverty & corruption to deal with than to join indecent acts with them. Those ones can easily be nibbed in the bud before they become chronic bad-sides.
On the economic side, the workforce is been seriously depleted by professionals migrating abroad, HIV/AIDS, malaria killing children every minute & mortality rate being high. It will be disastrous to encourage homosexualism (abi they can reproduce and have kids?!). If half of marriages are same-sex by 2012, don’t you think that the population will srongly reduce? A teeming population is one potential for a successful nation.
There’s no need calling trae names since you say it’s a free world. He’s only airing his views.
This is one of the few good bills that the National Assembly passed in a long while.
January 23rd, 2006 at 10:06 am
Hmmm, I have to chime in with the chorus here, Trae.
Who people choose to love and be with is their own business and not anyone elses’: not their family’s; friends’; nor the government’s. For the government to even make this an issue when there are so many other problems begging for attention is, quite honestly, beyond me.
January 23rd, 2006 at 1:19 pm
“Homosexualism is only prevalent in the West” –To say that homosexuality is not common in nigeria is BS. I grew up in nigeria, left for the US when I was 16. I have to admit I was ignorant of such a thing till I came to the US. But when I learnt of it, I started recalling memories of neighbors and classmates in naija. One particular neighbor comes to mind. Now I realize that dude was gay. Gay people in naija are just doing a good job of keeping it secret. Why? because we’ll probably look down upon them with the same level (if not more) of disdain and scorn that we look at folks with HIV, or teenages that get pregnant out of wedlock. Even worse, they probably fear for their lives, and end up keeping it to themselves.
I feel like my comment would be incomplete if I didn’t mention that I was a christain. My religion does not condone homosexuality, but it preaches compassion…, we christains forget the compassion part…
January 23rd, 2006 at 3:09 pm
I don’t believe that anybody can actually open their mouth to say that some women should be dick-whipped because they are not interested in having sex with men.
This is the sort of attitude that makes Nigerian men feel that they are entitled to women’s bodies and the fact that women have nowhere to go to report when sexual harassments and rapes occur.
Don’t you have any sisters? Irrespective of what they were doign with other women, would you like it if some guys decided that your sisters or daughters or whatever should be dick whipped?
DISGUSTING.
January 23rd, 2006 at 4:35 pm
At least you’ll agree with me that the brain(s) behind human life had a reason for giving men a penis and women a vagina
Trae and your ilk are extremely dangerous - to yourself and humanity. Is it that your homophobia is a symptom of the fear of homosexual within?
Get a life. Where is your compassion? homophobia is complete absence of love. I think if you have ever allowed yourself to truly love you wouldn’t speak the way you speak.
Perhaps you would like somebody to dick whip your sisters, mothers, daughters, girlfriends, wives? if you can yes to this questions, then you are a confirmed rapist. Do you know that dick whipping is rape by another name?
January 23rd, 2006 at 4:41 pm
Trae - I may be cynical but I wonder if your homophobic is not just a wind up. I say that as previously you have commented that each onto his/her own. It is disappointing to me that a young worldly person like yourself would take this stance. I have always enjoyed your writing which has an edge but why use language that demeans men and women.
No one seems to have picked up on the human rights issue that prevents any campaigning or activism around this subject. If that can happen to gays and lesbians it can happen to others too. So next time someone smokes a joint, a girl gets pregnant, a woman wants an abortion, a couple have sex before marriage - the list goes on - just remember that the religious and government mafia may make that a human rights issue as well.
January 23rd, 2006 at 9:22 pm
hey hey hey. you guys have blown this thing out of proportions.
i said “Anyways me thinks lesbos PROBABLY need a dick whipping”. in other words i mean Lesbians would probably change their minds if they had mind blowing sex with some dude. be easy people.
I’m sorry if i’ve hurt anyone but i still don’t think homosexuality is cool. let’s move on to other things people…please.
January 24th, 2006 at 1:51 pm
trae,
wats up shacks….shacks read only the first paragraph of ur stiory.. bob!! no tell me u dont vist 11.45, jives and golden plaza to fall some bottles… bobs u try.. as for me i gat drunk on my matric day…. wat a way to start..
keep it real
aboud lesbos… who cares once they dont hate the guys…….. and they r good on kissing and licking
January 24th, 2006 at 11:47 pm
There are lots of homosexuals in Nigeria. I am a gay Nigerian and I have lots of gay Nigerian friends. It’s because of bigoted languate like “dick whipped” that we have to keep our lives a secret… but things are changing for the better. You just wait… change is coming.
January 25th, 2006 at 4:22 pm
Trae, ultimately I dont think you meant any harm, but be a “Bigger Buoy” and take responsibility.
The Dick whipping statement was completeley inappropiate, you meant something completeley different and now you realise, you do not have enough experience with the subject matter, so apologise to those you may have offended and next time be more considerate when typing your opinions.
(alot of people read your blog so don’t be a disssssappointment)
The hip hop lyrics -No comment…
As an ABJ guy yourself realise something because of the kind of society we are from you may never easily guess who is gay and who isn’t even among your friends.
Most of the gay guys I know in Abuja are married and have families. Many of the (lesbians) girls from Zone 4 - Safari (different social classes) operate below the radar, but they exist!
How would you know?
Im sure you have partied with some and would never guess.
So as a young man , just try and keep an open mind you may learn something.
NB: wouldn’t it be fun to find out which one of these lawmakers was gay.
January 25th, 2006 at 5:06 pm
Trae:
While you need to be more diplomatic in your delivery - you state a truth: there is purpose and a brain behind all of creation. Whether you choose to accept it or not is your choice. It is a truth just as if you walk of a cliff you will fall. You can lie to yourself all you want about whether or not you won’t fall. Heck you can get brainwash a million people into believing they won’t fall off the cliff but a cliff is a cliff.
Because animals engage in homosexual activity doesn’t justify its correctness or it fitting in the grand purpose of creation. No one is born gay - there are usually abusive experiences that trigger homosexual tendencies in people. Usually an older man, brother, uncle, aunty that molests a young innocent child and robs the innocent child of his/her innocence. Another cause is lack of paternal/maternal love.
All human beings have something called a conscience. You can choose to sear that conscience - its your call. Your conscience is your barometer. The more you sear it, the more your judgement becomes clouded.
Also you can’t just act as you please. Act as you please and you have moral relativity.
Remember your conscience!! Don’t sear it!!
January 25th, 2006 at 5:17 pm
Having read through all the comments left thus far on this subject, I’ll concede that it has been thouroughly exhausted so there is no need for me to chime in! I just wanted to say thanks for your comment on my blog, I’m glad you like it! Just reading through yours, I can’t believe I haven’t come across it in the past. I’ve obviously been missing out on quite a treat!
January 29th, 2006 at 8:09 pm
Nice one there, Trae. Tell the gays and lesbians that they are LOSERS! Tell them again!
If they are not losers, how can’t they possibly win over a single person from the opposite sex. Sick, Odd, Awkward, Raw, Gross LOSERS.
Very soon, maybe in 10 years from now, you are going to hear that making love to animals is also natural. Hahahaha! And you’ll hear people saying things like these;
“I’m just naturally attracted to donkeys, and that’s the way I am”
“I wish to be married to a cockroach, that’s my own sexual orientation”
“I’ve always had a thing for squirrels and I hope people accept me this way”
And then the government would legalise Animal marriage and some mentally and psychologically imbalanced people would still say it’s free world!
Odd world full of odd people.