Banking, the ills: workaholicity and no time!

The “I say no time eh!” phrase by top Nigerian ragga artist Timaya best describes my condition in the in last four months, in which time I haven’t blogged (though “no inspiration eh” comes a distant second). Right now at 9.21 am it’s one of those precious weekends for me and as I type this on my generator-powered battery-weakened laptop in Makurdi I await the start of Nigeria’s game against Japan in the on going Olympic men’s football event. So what have I been up to all this while and what’s happened to the time? Here’s what.

I’ve since completed my bank’s ten week entry level training programme in Abuja and have been deployed to Makurdi branch in our North Central Region. Yes, my love affair with Benue State continues having served here (NYSC 2006/2007) and been back shortly afterwards for a short business venture.

Training school was fun no doubt but I also learnt a tremendous lot and had my mind opened to many new perspectives of life. Part of the gains of the training was being able to make my first ever visit to a prison…Kuje Prison Abuja to be precise. Banking being a profession based on trust, integrity is a necessary value and so the visit to the prison apart from its social responsibility import was to show us how low we could sink if we lost our integrity. The funny thing though is that Kuje Prison wasn’t at all like what I expected; it looked more like any well maintained Government boarding house secondary school in Abuja except that the inmates couldn’t leave the area…ever! There were the sober religious type, the ashamed from-a-comfortable-background type but most looked like the average Joe on the street type. Some buildings were recently painted, the compound was neat, there were a lot of new structures and the effect of charitable donations/support from the public/NGOs could be seen. Me thinks that being a population database poor, non safety and security conscious country an escape from the prison would be easy and have the least of consequences. Anyways I digress.

Back to the subject it feels good to be in banking. The opportunities it offers you are endless but the effize of the profession is too much; one could easily get carried away! One could also get “carried away” by the pressures of the job. The demands are heavy so to be on top of ish you’ve got to be sharp and proactively continuously learning. Worse still like I said at the beginning one’s time-crunched! We’ll survive though.

And survival starts with watching my first Dream Team 4 game at the Olympics in a short while. I almost can’t believe I missed their first match…an Eagle’s match!” Work sucks at time! I can believe though that the Abuja Stadium disappointed yet again spectator-wise at the Man U-Portsmouth game a fortnight ago. To the best of my knowledge the only time its stands ever filled up for a football match was The All African Games 2003 u-23 men’s final between Nigeria and Cameroun. As expected a large portion of the crowd got in for free and a much larger portion of the crowd of football lovers in the city just couldn’t be bothered. We shouldn’t loose hair or bothered too much to when ever Nigeria goes out of a football tournament. Football is an art not a science and even with the best of preparations one could still falter. Someone’s bound to loose…It ain’t gonna be me though. Ah game time! Excuse me while I do the needful. One!

Note: The official list is now out. Almost made 100% on my prediction save that both Richard Eromoigbe and Ifeanyi Emeghara made the squad while Ayila Yusuf didn’t.

I’m a keen follower of the Super Eagles, a statement confirmed by the fact that I hardly ever miss their games. I keep records too, a habit that’ll help me speak fanatically in this post. By the way I did some stuff like this last time around.

To me the best thing about Nigeria’s German born coach Berti Vogts is the frequency with which we now play friendly games, or games at all for that matter. The second best thing about him is his knack for experimentation and his squad selection style which has so far evened the rift between big and small players. Well I guess that should be expected with any new coach. Under Vogts The Eagles have faired thus:

Nigeria vs. Uganda 1-0 (ACN qualifier, 24th March 2007)
Kenya vs. Nigeria 0-1 (B-Grade Friendly, 27th May 2007)
Uganda vs. Nigeria 2-1 (ACN qualifier, 2nd June, 2007)
Niger vs. Nigeria 1-3 (ACN qualifier, 17th June, 2007)
Macedonia vs. Nigeria 0-0 (Friendly, 22nd August 2007)
Nigeria vs. Lesotho 2-0 (ACN qualifier, 8th September 2007)
Mexico vs. Nigeria 2-2 (Friendly, 14th October 2007)
Nigeria vs. Australia 0-1 (Friendly, 17th November 2007)
Switzerland vs. Nigeria 0-1 (Friendly, 20th November 2007)

Vogts is expected to release the official list for next month’s African Cup of Nations (ACN) by the 2nd week of December, but being everyone’s favourite neighbourhood dope man I though I’d let you guys in on the future.

My list is logically drawn from an analysis of the players that have earned caps under Vogts. It’s largely the same squad that Nigeria took to Egypt 2006. There are only 9 new players out of which 2: Yakubu and Olafinjana are not exactly new. Such consistency in squad selection hasn’t been witnessed before in the past 4 African Cup of Nations.

Austin Ejide A long time Eagles reserve keeper who hasn’t seen any action apart from the pre World Cup 2002 build up games, under Vogts Ejide’s time has finally arrived. He looks good to be the goal keeping first choice and possibly will be donning the number 1 jersey this time around. He’s a veteran of two ACNs: 2004 and 2006.

Dele Aiyenugba Prior to Vogts Greg Etafia and Rotimi Sunday were often the benefactors of the absence of The Eagles goal keeping regular. But under Vogts Aiyenugba has become the new back up man. He’s been to one ACN before the 2006 edition and will most likely don the number 12 jersey in Ghana.

Vincent Enyeama Erstwhile Eagles first choice goal keeper Enyeama has failed to see any action in a green shirt after letting in 4 goals in the last Eagles game prior to Vogts. A game in which Vogts watched from the stands! But his experience and skill is not in doubt and he’ll definitely make the squad as goal keeping third choice if like England’s David James he can swallow his pride. A veteran of the 2004 and 2006 ACNs Vincent looks good for a two digit jersey number in Ghana: 23, the same Ghana who with a gift of 4 goals earlier in the year are a team he’d surely love to hate.

Joseph Yobo The Eagles stand in captain has missed the last 6 games but being a consistent performer he looks likely to grab his starting number 2 shirt in Ghana. He played at the 2002, 2004 and 2006 ACNs.

Taye Taiwo The Eagles dependable left back with a knack for scoring goals is a sure first team starter. He’d be holding on to the number 3 jersey he wore at the 2006 ACN.

Danny Shittu Big and Bulky Shittu’s the new craze in central defence after having won Vogts heart. He’ll be pairing Yobo in Ghana donning his coveted number 6 jersey. He has no previous ACN experience.

Rabiu Afolabi Under Vogts Afolabi has finally made the transition from youth International to Senior Team international. He’s paired Shittu in most of the Eagles’ recent games but looks set to drop to the bench at Ghana where he’ll slug it out with Obinna Nwaneri for central defence vacancies. He also has no previous ACN experience but he should be with the number 5 jersey in Ghana.

Obinna Nwaneri The Rugged man of the team looks set to continue from where he stopped in Egypt as a central or right back defensive sub wearing the number 21 jersey.

Onyekachi Apam is following in the foot steps of his youth colleagues like Taiwo, Mikel, Kaita, and Ogbuke who became regulars or had stints in The Eagles. Sporting the number 16 jersey he won’t likely play a major role in Ghana. He too has no previous ACN experience.

Richard Eromoigbe or Ifeanyi Emeghara The final defensive slot will be taken by either of the two. They both might be ACN greenhorns but they’re capable of playing a variety of defensive roles. Either of the two will be with the number 22 shirt in Ghana.

Seyi Olafinjana Makes a return to the team after missing out on the 2006 ACN. He takes back the number 14 jersey which he wore at the 2004 edition.

Ayila Yusuf Seems to have lost his luck of exciting and scoring goals from his defensive midfield position. He gets back his ACN 2006 number 13 jersey but will have to justify a starting place this time around.

Onyekachi Okonkwo Another favoured son of Vogts but who can be both equally disappointing and excellent. Continuing in the same manner and with his inherited number 10 jersey he’ll probably get some playing time in what should be his first ACN.

Dickson Etuhu A late arrival to the Eagles but who has probably done enough in Vogts’ books to win a place in the squad he should be sporting the number 15 jersey in what should be his first ACN.

John Obi Mikel A darling of the Nigerian fans his place in Ghana was never in doubt. But what use Vogts will put him to and his change of shirt number to 18 is open for debate. He’s previously been at the 2006 ACN.

Nwankwo Kanu The experienced hand with 9 lives will be going to his 5th ACN in a row in Ghana but this time as Captain. Still donning the number 4 jersey he’s expected to lead the Eagles beyond the 3rd position this time around.

Obafemi Martins The Eagles own weapon of mass destruction might not be guaranteed a starting number 9 shirt In Ghana but his place as a core member of the team in a 2nd ACN running is not in doubt.

John Utaka Aptly christened Utaka the attacking attacker the number 7 sporting ball juggler is expected to improve on his 2004 and 2006 ACN performances in Ghana.

Osaze Odemwingie Another darling of the Nigerian fans, now sports the number 11 jersey but is still as sharp as ever and has great hopes thrust upon him in Ghana. He was also at the 2004 and 2006 ACNs.

Yakubu Aiyegbeni Has one of the most topsy-turvy Super Eagles career in recent times. But stays relevant due to his club goal scoring luck which has more than a few times rubbed off on him in a green shirt. He gets the number 8 jersey along with a chance to do what he could not do in the 2002 and 2004 ACNs.

Stephen Ayodele Makinwa Unanimously hated by fans but loved by coaches he makes a return to the ACN (with the number 19 jersey) which he first experienced in 2006. With the plethora of strikers in the squad we can’t but wait to see what role he’ll play in Ghana.

Ikechukwu Uche Is the Youngman with the blessings of the fans at the moment. Quick on his toes and exciting in a green shirt he’s the 2007/2008 edition of Julius Aghahowa at his prime. Not surprisingly he’ll be with the number 17 shirt at what will be his first ACN.

Obinna Nsofor Another great ball juggler with youth on his side gets the chance to build on his 2006 ACN baptism but this time donning the number 20 jersey.

Right back Chidi Ordiah and midfielder Christian Obodo are the players that will be most missed in the squad no thanks to the lengthy span of their injuries this year. While midfielder Paul Obiefule will be the player most hurt about not making the squad. He’s been very consistent “on the bench” in the past 10 or so Eagle’s games but getting the chance to play only once or twice during the period.

It’s almost been a month since I ditched my khaki and stepped into the free world, and if you asked me “nwokem ke kwanu?” I’d tell you “nna/nne…I just dey”.

Listening to RayPower Abuja 100.5 FM’s “Political Platform” at 9.15am on weekdays is one of the ways that have helped me keep my sanity. It’s a program which aims to wrap up the political news of the day in just 15 minute. And the presenters: Ehiedu Aniagwu, Mustafa Mohammed, Amaechi Anakwe and Okhiria Agbonsuremi are surely doing a good job at that. Quite similar to what their colleague Gbenga Arulegba does on AIT Abuja’s “Focus Nigeria” from 9-10am on weekdays. One thing though is that in the heat of the analysis the presenters at times take things too personal and display unprofessionalism. But who can blame them, since on the other hand NTA chose to be unobjective during the famous third term craze and to some extent in this year’s general elections. Another thing I’ve realized about the show is that the same magnitude with which they hate Obasanjo is the same magnitude with which they respect Yar’dua (well that’s quite common on a lot of fronts). Anyway the popularity of the show is evidence of the fact that the respect of people’s right to free speech is to a large extent well alive in Nigeria.

If RayPower helps me with my sanity the FRSC makes me loose it. I just got my (renewed) driving license after over two months of stress. And that’s because I chose not to cut corners but follow due process. Damn I hate guys in uniform; inefficiency is their middle name in Nigeria! Fuck that though as I should be on to better things this evening. I just got my invitation card to the BBC world Service Trust sponsored “Wetin Dey?” Da Mix show at the Sheraton Hotel. It should be some great entertainment as Modenine, Terry Tha Rapman, Weird MC, MI (of the crowd mentality fame) amongst others are on the bill. Shamefully I haven’t attended too many shows in the FCT so I’m really looking forward to this.

Quick observation; is it not hypocritical that we celebrate when Nigerians are making waves abroad with their businesses but suddenly feel threatened or that there’s cause for alarm when foreigners come here and rake in huge profits with their own businesses. Anyway this seems to be true for all nations; it’s a greedy world isn’t it?

This was the scene after one of our goals in our first match against France in the soon to end FIFA Under-17 WorldCup. They seem to be doing some traditional dance steps. See as the assistant referee come dey bad eye dem. Abeg just bring home the cup jare, no do like dem Femi Opabunmi of the 2001 Under-17 and dem Mikel Obi of the 2005 under-20 who went all the way only to loose at the finals.

Fellow Nigerians as is expected everybody and their blog alter ego has a take on current situations in the nation. Well not to be outdone here’s my own, only that it’s in a “no long thing” format. Cheers.

Naira Redenomination policy
My verdict: not a bad policy. A lot of the people against it just haven’t fully understood or read up on the implications. But Soludo does deserve some heavy knocks for not thinking of it earlier and allowing millions to be wasted on the now needless new coins and notes, plus millions more that are yet to be wasted on further reprinting and mass-enlightenment. The only part I hate is the coins reintroduction; I don’t think we’ll ever get used to that again.

South South security situation
Like some other people thinking about this just makes me go “oh dear”. The Niger Delta might be getting the raw deal off their oil but violence is never the way to go about solving problems. All the cultist and militants are frauds; they’re all in it for the money. The police and military should for once wake up to their core duty of protecting life and property and deal with situation effectively.

Profligacy and embezzlement of national wealth by leaders
The House of Reps case being the latest example of this phenomenon. Blame this on our “chop-and-quench-tomorrow-fit-no-dey” psyche. It’s a shame we’ve gone so selfish misusing vast amounts of wealth not knowing that these same amounts can do wonders for local infrastructural community development or as grants to the less privileged. 8,500 Naira might be chicken change to a few people but for a lot of others particularly youth corpers it’s often been a life saver.

Lagos indecent dressing and Covenant University brouhaha
I know that in liberalized societies like the US and UK there is the tendency for the family system to be fucked up. But even worse things happen in the so called socialist, value-respecting societies. The fact is that democracy and its inherent freedom is the best way ever for society to live by. We’re all mortals and equals; no man has the right to forcefully impose his will or standards on others. We should chill with all the religious and moral hypocrisy and allow people to indulge as they like. It’s a free world, it’s their life and the consequences are theirs to bear alone.

Reduced English Premier League broadcast
I couldn’t care less about this. We’re already too obsessed with that league for our own good. Hopefully this will afford people the chance to now get a life. And instead when we keep it football it’ll now be by watching the Under-17 and Under-21 male teams, they seem to be doing well these days. And there’s even added joy with the Super Eagles; Berti Vogts has been getting us the friendlies on a regular basis! Although our joy would be complete if the games were transmitted live.

Uche Nworah-Binyavanga irony mix-up
We all have what we’re extremely passionate about and will defend till death, in Uche’s case it’s his beloved Ndigbo. It’s just that he took it overboard. No one’s perfect we all err; so everyone who’s been on his case is better off giving him a break. They should note that an advice given harshly often defeats its aim as it ends up upsetting its’ target instead of correcting it.

I’ve never watched as much movies as I’ve done in the past one month, (no) thanks to pirated DVDs from China that are now flooding the Nigerian market. Anyways it’s great stuff: very cheap top quality films to watch at will with little hassles!

When life fails you be sure that your football team will follow suit. Famous words made known to me by Mr Soccer for Suckers. But now I’m experiencing a pain of another kind; the pain of seeing your favourite player being gradually phased out from your national team. In my case Julius Aghahowa being the player and the Super Eagles of Nigeria being the team. Aghahowa’s name wasn’t included in the team list for the Nigeria-Niger Ghana2008 Nations Cup qualifier to be played in Abuja on September 2nd. Coach Eguavoen doesn’t seem to like him or to be political correct thinks his time is up. But this is made all the more painful by the fact that Obafemi Martins has been getting an undeserved starting shirt in the last few games the Eagles have played. I know that it’s the normal sequence for most players (You know there’s always a time to rise and shine and a time to bow out. At your peak you’re boy-wonder but than months or years down the line you’re doing a lot of training but no playing and it goes down hill from there) but I just can’t seem to get over it. I’ve loved Aghahowa since his Nigeria’99 days; he grew on me probably because he dons my favourite number: 17. But no doubt about it the guy delivers. No other Eagle since let’s say 2000 has made a career out of scoring when it matters and scoring really crucial goals! Evidence abounds: the Nigeria-Senegal game in 2000, the Nigeria-Sweden game in 2002, and the Nigeria-Gabon game in 2005 to name but a few. That’s why he’ll be remembered for years to come.

By the way big ups to our Under-20 girls doing us proud at the ongoing FIFA tournament in Russia. The last minute win against Canada was sweet! Beautiful goals, beautiful and feminine girls for a change, plaited hair which allowed ease of play, “youthful looks”…what else can I say? Bring the damn cup home girls!

This article by Aba Boy and the comment flow in it between Chxta and Errata motivated me to go on this roll. Minus the fact that we speak the same language with the US and England (thus we’re more in each others business) our large population of over 120 million people is the other major reason that adds to our being easily victimised (given a bad name) as a nation.

Let me break it down for you. A large population = a greater chance of a richer economy = more importance on a global scale = foreign influx and citizen out flux = more international media local headquarters = more news time = more bad press. I mean when last did you hear a story about Equatorial Guinea? There’s more: as a parent when are you more likely to get a call to report to the station that your child is in police custody; when you have two kids or when you have seven kids? When you have seven. You guess correctly.

But it’s a pity that as Nigerians ourselves we’ve allowed the negativity to possess us. I saw a C-class celebrity, a guy from the Star Trek Talent Hunt Show performing on TV with a live band. I was naturally happy for him but I was gob smacked when I realised he was a Fela wannabe doing some Nigeria-bad-this-our-leaders-corrupt-that rhymeless, uninspiring singing. Don’t get me wrong he’s free to do that and he’s speaking the truth to an extent but when it reaches a level that you hit out at the nation solely to blow up and to score cheap points as being a conscious artist then something’s wrong. In the same vein when one makes a career out of seeing only the negative than something must also be wrong. A bad story, oh goody-goody something to blog about, a good story oh boring not blog worthy. I know a few bloggers like that. They’re good but too damn one-sided. I eat up their shit light heartedly and balance it with other info if not I’ll end up a pessimist.

Two extra years in UNN, partially my fault/
But fuck it I’ve now got my statement of result/
Enough lessons learnt, give all praises to Jah/
NYSC next level, come September I ja/…one!

Interpretation: I’ve now OFFICIALLY joined the prestigious group of people with a first degree from UNN. I sent the above sms to some friends. Here’s my favourite reply; it’s from Stanclef:

Your next target, the labour market/
You’ve got your statement, the future is now the present/
Get a job, get married and raise rugrats/
Finally hommie congrats/…go get high

So I’ve got two months before service, seems I’ll be interning at one of the radio stations in Abuja. Let’s see how it goes.

Catherine: What do we do now, Nick?
Nick: Fuck like minks, raise rugrats and live happily ever after.
Catherine: Hate rugrats.
Nick: Fuck like minks, forget the rugrats, and live happily ever after

One of the classic movie quotes/last lines. It’s from Sharon Stone and Michael Douglas’ Basic Instinct. Talk about being pussy whipped.

WorldCup ’06…it’s almost over; just had to put in some of my observations. Have you noticed the alarming number of early goals scored in this tournament; particularly in the group stages and in the second round? By early goals I mean goals scored in the first ten minutes, and to be precise in the fourth minute! It almost became a ritual, game kicks off and I’m looking at my watch. Four minutes later, pronto! The net is shaketh. It’s really that easy…or is it?

Have you also noticed the glaring similarity of team jerseys? I swear it’s annoying; uniqueness has been thrown to the winds, as except for colour teams now wear virtually the same jerseys! There was no difference between the white jersey of the Swiss and that of the Tunisians. Both teams were kitted by Puma (the main offenders in this case) who kitted a total of twelve teams at this finals, all with the same design template. What ever happened to the good old France ’98 days when each team had a completely different jersey design from the other even if kitted by the same sports company? Uniqueness is a much cherished human value…what more when it comes to national pride it goes without saying.

Johan Djourou of Switzerland and David Jemmali of Tunisia

Has anyone resident in Nigeria being having GSM voicemail issues? Well I have, but this article really put me through. You might want to check it out. Just know that the default voicemail number for Globacom is 0805111 and that of VMobile is 08020100155.

A few days ago I was checking my blog stats like I normally do and I saw I was getting crazy hits from the BBC. I put on my imaginary glasses and discovered I was quoted in an article titled: “Blogging Africa’s World Cup”. The article is basically a collation of a few African bloggers take on the ongoing WorldCup. Damn, that’s totally righteous man. It’s nice to get the chance to represent Africa at something.

I swear it’s cool watching football with no strings attached. Patriotism can be a real muther******. I remember our loss to Côte d’Ivoire at the ACN2006 semi-finals; I’ve never been as annoyed because of a match as I was then. I was raving and yelling through out the game and at blast of the final whistle I felt like crying. Added to that Momsie teased me after the loss and I stormed out of the house angry. But you should see me now; I’m a big flirt football wise and its fun!

As much as the WorldCup is a melting point of cultures, the national teams are melting points of another kind. You can find peeps of all types repping one country. And it’s courtesy of the mix-raced thingy, immigration and emigration, acquired citizenship and footballers playing for the countries of their parents. Checkout Figueiredo and Ricardo of Angola or the black dominated French squad with space sef for the Indian like Dhorasoo to fit in. it’s a beautiful thing ain’t it?

I think it’s about time God sent me a laptop. Computers are so much a part of my life that it’s criminal for me not to have one. There’s only one PC at my crib and PHCN issues coupled with sharing issues often deny me the chance of enjoying the damn thing to the max. I swear PC waiting is worse than TV waiting (sitting through a boring program on TV and not being able to change it cos someone else is watching it). Just as some Nigerians like to say “South South for Presidency in 2007, non negotiable!”; I’m saying I need to use the PC when I need to use the PC, non negotiable!

I’m tired of reading/hearing stuff from people (arguing with people) at the opposite end saying Hip hop is bad, Hip hop is dead, Nigerian artists sound and sing too Westernized, Hip hop artists swear too much, TRAE stop swearing…whatever man. “That’s how it is” by OD is just what the doctor recommended. Over and out.

The Black stars of “Africa”, una well done

I’ve been being shuffling/reediting my posts of recent. The first two comments of this post are testament to that. But any which ways no think am, just enjoy the writing.

Dey don mark am say we go make am
Papa God don sign am say we do am
Na my destiny, so make you no think am

Have you heard that song? It might be rhymeless and might be the latest hit by a fluke-one hit wonder-Lagos ghetto boy but I sure am feeling it.

Translation:
It has been declared that we’ll make it in life
God himself has signed It that we’ll succeed
It’s my destiny so don’t even think about stopping my progress

Was feeling iree yesterday so I copped four albums. Dare Art Alade’s “from me 2 u”, Paul Play Dairo’s “hitsville”, Sound Sultan’s “the compulsory text-book” and Rymzo de Gusto’s “mysterious”. Oophs, they’re all Lagos based artist, anyways good music is good music. But I’m still waiting on a tight “rap” Nigerian album, I’ve seen no one worth coping yet (I’ve been meaning to buy El Dee of the Trybesmen’s album, but I can’t seem to find it). So is it a case of no one keeping it real rap-wise again, poor marketing or maybe I’m not checking the right music stores? By the way I recorded a song last week with a bunch of guys. But I haven’t been able to get my hands on a copy. When I do I’ll upload it. Watch this space for follow ups.

The WorldCup starts today! But the problem is that the power situation in Abuja is at its all time worst. PHCN are so fucking unpredictable, they seize the power almost every day for at least five hours. Some years back we were really living it up in AMAC (Abuja Municipal Area Council) but now I’m sorry to say I enjoy more power at UNN than I do here. Kai! Anyways make I no think am, match viewing center na de very place to hit.

I know say you get issues and worse still Naija no go dey WorldCup but no think am, just enjoy the football

Some months back peeps were blogging about the qualities they want in their ideal man/woman while all I did was observe. But what the fuck here’s my own list. Note that it’s all just dreams, in reality we’re bound to compromise.

1) My ideal girl must be a “soji” babe…sharp, intelligent…she has got to have brains. But on the other hand she should have a great sense of humour. You know be the fun loving, friendly, dramaless and laid back type.

2) Sharing the same interests with me would be a big plus. Most importantly would be my music interest/taste. I don’t want to be getting blown off my hip hop, rock, traditional or slow jamz while she’s getting high off “aka nchawa” (an Igbo gospel song).

3) I’m also on that emotional shit. My girl must be romantic, she must pamper me, she must be a sex bomb and she must be my down ass chick who’ll be there for me 24-7.

4) I like my girls chubby, cute and sexy (sort of thick). You know the bigger (in size) the better (in the right places). But not fat oh! Paris Hilton skinny is definitely a no-no.

5) Many girls like their men tall. But if your idea of a couple is the girl as short as Jada Pinkett Smith and the man as tall as Will Smith than hell no. I want my girl to be almost as tall as me so I can kiss her with ease. Besides it’s cuter that way.

6) I’m not religion obsessed…specific. As far as she’s positive minded it’s ok with me. I’m also not tribe or race specific.

7) Age wise I’ll not want to be older than my girl by more than five years. But if she’s older, at most by two years. That way she’ll be more of a pal/buddy to me.

I like ’em black, white, Puerto Rican or Haitian/Japanese, Chinese or even Asian

It’s not just girls that are crazy about kids, yours truly dreams about having kids! In the Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfieffer film “the story of us” the guy with the patriotic orgasm favourite line was “God bless America, God bless America”. Me! My favourite line at the moment is “I want you to have my baby”. If well deployed in the course of putting your bid in or hitting it it’s a knockout. But I ain’t going old school like our parents, I ain’t raising no football team. Two or three would be just fine. But if by the time I’m 35 I’m unmarried and girlfriendless I’m going the Michael Jackson route and finding me a surrogate. Departing this world childless ain’t in my plans; I want to raise me a little man/lady.

This might not go down well with my friends but at times I find the whole Arsenal, Barcelona, Man U, Chelsea, Liverpool, Juventus for life thing very irritating. Especially when coming from Nigerians based in Naija who don’t know the half about the team they claim to support. The only team I give a damn about are my darling Super Eagles. Yes oh, in the last six years I’ve hardly missed a grade A Super Eagles match. But being that we won’t be at Germany I’m giving my heart to the Carthage Eagles of Tunisia. The players, the coach, the team play, the jersey…damn. Tunisia is the team for me at next months WorldCup. Good luck to the other African teams.

This post is meant to clear the storm about homosexuality that has been raging on TRAE days. Don’t even bother yourself with trying to keep the storm going cos I’ll delete your comment. If you want to discuss homosexuality, do it on your blog.

Jeremy and Owukori misinterpreted my statements and started this storm. When I said “lesbos probably need a dick whipping” I meant that lesbians would most likely have a change of heart on their sexual orientation if they had mind blowing sex with a guy.

If I’ve hurt anybody in the process I’m sincerely sorry. But I still don’t think homosexuality is cool. Since it matters so much to a lot of people what I think about gays, I’m ready to change my mind if the price is right. In the end it’s all about the Naira you know.

For peeps who still think I’m homophobic check this: I’ve started reading afrohomo’s blog! Dude’s writing is simply captivating! And also check this:

I flow straight and precise, like a man killing device/
Fuck with me I’ll take your life, cos my heart’s as cold as ice/
My mouth’s raw as Obie Trice, I love dykes I ain’t biased/
Wanna battle (me)? Come on be wise, I’ll fuck you (up) like a fly ass/

“Dyke” is a slang term for a lesbian.

Thanks for all the love and hate. And Yes I still think hip hop and soccer is life. If you think otherwise, keep it to yourself. It’s a free world.

Although I’m not much of a soccer player, soccer is still the love of my life. It’s the greatest sport in the world! One of the things I really like about it is the celebration that ensues when a goal is scored. It’s not a high scoring sport like basketball so goal celebrations are really wild. The crowd goes crazy and the goal scorer (along with his team mates) gets to celebrate in (almost) any way they like. I’m really really loving the goal celebrations in the on-going African Cup of Nations. Most of them involve a little dance and right now they are the coolest thing on earth!

See Nigeria’s Taye Taiwo’s celebration after scoring against Ghana.
See Côte d’Ivoire’s Drogba’s celebration after scoring against Libya.
See Senegal’s Henry Camara’s celebration after scoring against Zimbabwe.

The list goes on. For my Nigerians who want to get every detail about our ACN campaign Kickoffnigeria.com and forum.cybereagles.com are the very places to be at. Peace!

The Super Eagles celebrate after Taye Taiwo’s goal