Effective information management is a bit like multi tasking and getting it right

Anyone that really knows me in person should be aware that I like to be on top of things information wise. Like the seeker I take great pride in getting relevant info and go to great lengths to organize that info for effective use (I think I got this quality from my dad). And feeling particularly generous or scholarly today I want to bless you with my “Seven habits of highly effective information managers”; hereby referred to as HEIMs. On a Zain level I’m in a frenzy like one of my previous bank big boss, who was twice flown in from Lagos to lecture us in training school, and on both occasions ended up basing his talk (both talks independent of the other) on Stephen R Covey’s “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People”. So let’s get started on capacity building information management wise.

1) HEIMs abhor illiteracy in all its forms because to really appreciate the importance of information management one has to be technologically aware, pragmatic and open minded. HEIMs would probably work in intelligence if they were in the army. For the young ones in secondary school my advice would be not to limit oneself to only reading the Bible, religious books and self help books but to explore the world of contemporary Nigerian fiction. Personally my favourite reads are informative/write ups/novels which come with a heavy dose of humour.

2) We would all the more be HEIMs in Nigeria if we probably had a good database management system in place. All my analysis leads me to the conclusion that if we fixed that we would be on the road to resolving a lot of our national problems. From census and population planning, to voter registration, to crime detection/prevention, to fiscal control and bank loan supervision, to academic records availability and so on and so forth. That’s why it behooves on us to take the issue of record keeping and maintenance seriously in our daily dealings. There are little things in life as sweet as being updated about the past in a jiffy and thus being privileged to make inform choices in the present that will affect your future positively.

3) HEIMs excel in phone bookkeeping and are forever grateful for the miracle that is telecommunication. They understand the beauty of talking the talk and getting thoughts across at the touch of a button. So characteristically they are always reachable by phone, text and call generously as the need arises, excel at colleting contacts of useful people and those they just must deal with on the daily, have a good contact backup culture, have more than one line considering the peculiar unstableness of our telecoms networks, and understanding the importance of networking strive for phone number retention. Some extra tips: for ease of backups you might want to jot down your numbers daily as you collect them and exploit the PC suite and sync function of your phone. Also aim for hand sets with unlimited contact storage. To get ahead 200 SIM memory plus 200 phone memory handsets are not the way to go. Additionally learn to save names in full or with descriptive suffixes for ease of recall.

4) HEIMs understanding the reality that is information overload, trash programming and junk content are constantly trying to stay geeky/nerdy yet work and leisure balanced. By analyzing and sieving what is available before brain consumption they stay on the natural high. Personally I try not to over indulge myself and stay away from things that don’t add anything substantive to my IQ. This means I’m constantly battling procrastination in favour of studying and computer programming. And when it comes to news feed, favouring blogs with original content as against gossip blogs and news recyclers.

5) HEIMs being aware of the power of the world wide web/computers practice the complete use of it as a means to an end. Here’s what you’ll find them doing. They streamline their email addresses as much as possible and harness the powers of Gmail and email clients. You’d be hard press to find them on the loosing end of domain drops because of unread/unreceived renewal reminders. They are on top of password management (at my former job FinnOne, a banking suite software failed partly because of the issue of password forgetfulness). And they embrace the idea of website and company portals as information nests. A case in point: it’s dumb…almost criminal for INEC not to publish the list of qualified candidates/test invitees on its website during it recent recruitment exercise. Also as seen in many companies the issue of sending out important memos/policy updates only via email without repository on the company’s portal for easy long term reference is akin to dishing out instructions and the receivers inundating it from one ear and letting it slip out through the other.

6) HEIMs are by nature effective. In line with this they wholly embrace the use of a diary in their day to day planning. Not being cyborgs people grapple with the issue of forgetfulness but HEIMs keep on top of their schedule and plan accordingly with diary entries and reminders. Be them electronically on phone/computers or in hand in books. A follow up trait of effectiveness is getting things done without having to be prodded and doing so as if the direct gain was for oneself. In other words HEIMs treat with dispatch issues which require their attention. And in doing so they keep it scientific, scientific in the sense that their workings are carried out in a way that on analysis a third party can easily understand what has transpired thus and take relevant follow up action.

7) Lastly but also very importantly HEIMs don’t have an attitude problem. With globalization should come the common sense that nobody’s indispensable and that we all need each other sooner or later and as such we should treat each other with courtesy and respect. On a Majek Fashek-2face Idibia tip, little little patience and cordialness in our conduct now can have big positive implications later. Tolerance, politeness, a thank you here, excuse me or sorry there can in some way get you that information when the need arises that’ll help you break fronts.


The world Cup South Africa 2010 being now 40 days away, the true Super Eagles fan should have these three World cup songs on his/her playlist:

1) Power of Naija. Guinness commissioned World Cup song performed by Omawumi, 2face Idibia and Cobhams
2) Waving flag (Nigerian Version). Coca-Cola commissioned K'naan’s World Cup song performed by Banky W & M.I.
3) Goalaaaso (Inside The Net). Paj featuring Tolumide. From Paj of “Ghana go hear wien (2006)” and “skatta dem (Ghana go hear wien part II 2008)” fame.

What is peace of mind? Peace of mind is what you experience within in a system where there’s accountability. It’s a situation where the supplier strives to satisfy and the customer gets to clear his/her head of all worries in association with the particular service provider. It’s excellent customer service and to ensure it great quick feed back is key.

At my former job we once had a customer walk into the bank and try to create a scene in the banking hall. The issue: he was a debit card holder from another bank and while attempting to withdraw money on our branch’s ATM he was debited but cash was not dispensed. The Issue happened over a month ago and after repeated complaints at his bank in frustration he decided to come over here to see how he could get his money back. Ideally such issues are resolved thus:

-Customer complains at his bank giving ATM officer there all necessary details of the incident
-ATM officer of his bank logs complaint into Interswitch website.
-Interswitch forwards complaint to “erring bank”
-Head Office of other bank liaises with branch (branch ATM officer) responsible for particular ATM
-issue is investigated and if other bank’s claim legitimate entries are reversed and feedback given to Interswitch
-Interswitch in association with customer’s bank makes sure customer is credited (pay back) accordingly

After some questioning it appeared ATM officer of customer’s bank had yet to log in complaint or did so erroneously as though our ATM officer observed the error he hadn’t prior being petitioned about it. Customer in lamenting the situation brought the “do you know who I am” angle, and in response a good number of my colleagues went cold towards him and thought the man was making a mountain out of a mole house (paltry 15 thousand Naira), especially for someone of his calibre. This is where the peace of mind angle comes into play. My money is my money, be it six hundred naira or sixty thousand Naira and I have every right to be extremely cross by its perceived theft. The right way to handle the situation was to empathise with customer (no matter the extent of your own perceived personal problems), explain to him the process flow for resolution and to truly show you understood his plight and to prevent him from continually running from post to post offer to speak on phone to ATM officer of his bank explaining to him your findings.

More often than not we’ve complained about treatment meted out to us by perceived aloof bodies, but on occasions when the tables were flipped we did the same to others. The inspiration to write this arose out of the recent experiences I had with my website in regards to its Registrar and its hosting.

I’ll be forever grateful to Chippla Vandu for taking care of my site’s registrar bills for the first 5 years and Kayode Muyibi for doing same hosting wise. The favour was truly invaluable. But alas we at times sadly fumble in an otherwise smooth long run. To use some economics jargons (hopefully correctly) Kayode went beyond his elasticity and the economics of scale proved counter productive. This is where Nigerian entrepreneurs (a good number of Nigerian web businesses are solely run, or handled by 2-5 hands) must beware, try and expand within your capacity so that you don’t get overwhelmed in providing support to your clients. Else it would be a case of abandoning your solid bowl in place of a porously leaking bucket in your attempt to fill your water drum stationed in your kitchen. The issue of Oluniyi David Ajao (owner of web4africa.net) versus Naira.Kbps (first register of nairabytes.com) is another sore case. It’s truly shameful the way the issue deteriorated. Even if it was against Web4Africa’s policy to refund hosting payment the moral thing to do was to push the domain name ownership to Naira.Kbps, as against the case now where the site’s registration having expired has been acquired by a domain parking shark.

So in conclusion for your peace of mind I strongly recommend Netfirms and Hostgator to Nigerians resident at home when it comes to the business of Domain name registration and hosting respectively. Slightly expensive they might be for some people; the truly informed and knowledgeable know that no price is too expensive to pay for peace of mind. And that it’s better to be a king in the jungle (run your own shit, have full ownership/control) then to be a dog in the city. Props to Sound Sultan.

Domain name registration on Netfirms is presently one of the cheapest on ground. You can easily pay with your Nigerian bank issued VisaCard or MasterCard. But be sure to have a scanned copy of your ID and your card available for confirmation purposes. And you can easily search online for coupons to reduce you bills. Props to Sawyerr Ken for the plenty tips.

Hostgator is undoubtedly one of the most reliably Domain host in existence. Their customer service is second to none. Tickets are replied typically in less than an hour and you can even chat live with a support staff 24-7! Site content transfers can also be done free of charge for new customers, who also get the advantage of price coupon discounts on their first signup. Like on Netfirms payments can easily be made with your Nigerian bank issued VisaCard or MasterCard (this time preferable issued in your own name). And be also sure to have a scanned copy of your ID and your card available for confirmation purposes. In extreme cases and sadly due to the wide spread fame of our 19 boys Nigerian customers have been known to be asked to send in pictures of them holding their ID cards. Cost might be pricey but peace of mind is guaranteed! In this case props to Udegbunam Chukwudi Emmanuel for the plenty tips.

True peace of mind is people helping people

This was originally meant for another platform to be published February 25th, a day after Yar’adua touched down. Alas it now finds its’ final resting place here :-)

In the words of former FCT Minister Nasir El-Rufai

“When we elect our leaders we fully expect that they will be strong-minded and able-bodied to guide us through the most difficult times. We also expect our leaders to address us directly and offer assurances to the fact that crisis situations will be kept under control”.

Unfortunately Nigerians time and time again are often left wondering if their leaders are aware of the concept of accountability. Fresh from a 92 day absence of our President, Umaru Yar'adua in Saudi Arabia, find profiled the noticeable incidents internal and external which have reigned this while, greatly imprinting themselves in the sands of “Nigerian time”.

• In December 2009 just before Christmas the unpopular beliefs and policies of CBN Governor Sanusi Lamido struck a lethal blow as thousands of workers were rendered jobless in mass lay offs carried out by many Nigerian banks; the alleged troubled and sound ones alike. Unemployment rates soured with the risk of rising crimes and many a families had a bitter festive season. Government reaction: business went on as usual while the seemingly endless trial of the nauseatingly rich ex bank top shots carried on at snail speed.

• Nigeria was at the center of international attention when on Christmas Day December 25, 2009 a 23 year old Islamic Nigerian male Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab attempted to detonate plastic explosives hidden in his underwear while on board Northwest Airlines Flight 253, en route from Amsterdam to Detroit, Michigan USA. Seen as a grave act of terror Nigeria was subsequently put on a Terror Blacklist by the US government and young Mutallab charged on six criminal counts, including attempted use of a weapon of mass destruction and attempted murder of 289 people. He is presently in U.S. custody, awaiting further legal proceedings. Nigerians travelers were thus left to suffer an international backlash while the government more or less barked toothlessly.

• Maryam Babangida wife of former head of state General Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida (IBB) passed away on December 27, 2009 in a US hospital having lost her prolonged battle with ovarian cancer. Many people still love to hate IBB for the alleged unprecedented level of corruption during his regime and the annulment of the June 12 1993 presidential elections. Nevertheless Maryam even in death remains celebrated as an icon of beauty, fashion and style", and widely acclaimed as Nigeria's best first lady. Reactions: having spent millions of looted monies on healthcare in the US having neglected our own, the looters of the national treasury and the family alike proceeded to further spend money in consoling and morning their dead.

• Much long before the proclamation of Dr Goodluck Jonathan as acting president the turn of events proved that President Yar'adua was by all indications unable or incapacitated to perform his function and therefore should step aside. This arose as Nigeria's new Chief Justice of the Supreme Court; Aloysius Katsina-Alu was on 30th December, 2009 sworn in by the out-going Justice Idris Legbo Kutiji in the absence of President Umaru Yar'Adua. This was legal under the Oaths Act.

• On Tuesday, 12 January 2010 the world was left in shock that a catastrophic earthquake had struck in the Caribbean state of Haiti affecting over 3 million people. With thousands dead, thousands more rendered homeless and the socio economic foundation of the nation rocked to its root. Many countries responded to the appeals for humanitarian aid, pledging funds and dispatching rescue and medical teams, engineers and support personnel. Nigeria’s response being an official expression of condolence and a donation of 1 million US dollars

• While the children of the rich continue to enjoy uninterrupted education abroad and politicians in the corridors of power continue to feed fat over the country’s oil money. the educational front back home was dealt a heavy blow as the authorities of the University of Nigeria (UNN), Nsukka in Enugu State on the 16th of January, 2010 shut down the institution, following the vandalization and destruction of property, including the temporary residential quarters of the Vice Chancellor, Prof Barth Okolo and some senior staff quarters of the institution by protesting students. The violent protest embarked upon by the university students was to express their displeasure over a new fees regime introduced by the university authorities

• Coming on the heels of a similar incident over a year ago in December 2008 and in what amounted to a total failure of leadership by both the Police, Military and Plateau state government, violence started on the 17th of January 2010 and lasted at least four days in Jos. The disturbances were allegedly religiously-motivated as Muslims and Christians took to arms and proceeded to torch down and destroy houses, churches, mosques and vehicles. At least 200 people were killed. Government reaction, a change of heads at the state police’s top boss office and the setting up of another commission of inquiry.


• Following an advertorial published in the Punch Newspaper of January 28 by a group going by the name "The True Face of Lagos" accusing Lagos Governor Mr. Babatunde Fashola and the Lagos House of Assembly of corrupt activities. The house members had intended to go on with a probe. But after wide public criticism and protest marches things died down considerable over the past week. Owing most notable to an intervention between Governor Babatunde Fashola and his immediate predecessor Bola Ahmed Tinubu who is though to be displeased with some of the actions of the former, and a court order from a Lagos High Court restraining further actions on any purported investigation of allegations of financial impropriety.

• Although things have considerable improved now, the months of December 2009 and January 2010 were hell for motorist in the nation as regards availability of fuel. Long queues sprang up nationwide as Nigerians commercial and private motorist alike were helplessly subjected to hardship in a bid to refill their tanks. Black marketers and those engaged in the up and downstream section of petroleum distribution smiled to the banks as they are want to do perennially. Government reaction: a statement by then Vice President Goodluck Jonathan which was eventually defiled ordering four of his ministers to stay back in Abuja during the Christmas holidays for a series of meetings aimed at finding a lasting solution to the lingering fuel scarcity.

• Following growing disbelief by the general populace about the integrity of members of the Federal Executive Council in relation to the president’s absence and the greater good of the nation, Minister of Information and Communication Prof. Dora Akunyili had on 3rd February 2010 somewhat restored her public image when she presented a memo to the Federal Executive Council (FEC) titled "if We Fail To Act Now, History Will Not Forgive Us", asking Yar’Adua to present a letter of vacation to the Senate as required by section 145 of Nigeria’s 1999 constitution. Her action had initially drawn the ire of her colleagues most notably former Attorney-General of the Federation and Minister of Justice Michael Aondoakaa (SAN), prompting a nasty back and forth between them. In the end though swords were sheathed and the objectives were met as Dr Goodluck Jonathan was declared acting president.

• In what was hailed as the best move for the country’s hot bed of politics Anambra State. Governor Peter Obi of the all peoples grand alliance APGA on the 6th of February 2010 defied the history books as he won a keenly contested battle for a second term in office against fellow political gladiators Dr. Chris Ngige of the AC and Professor Chukwuma Soludo of the PDP amongst others. Little pockets of irregularities were observed with more than half of the voters disenfranchised owing to the non availability of their names on the voting list. Encouragingly though the results were more or less accepted by all parties involved without the usual electoral court appeal.

• After much political anger on the seeming power vacuum, exemplified by protest rallies; most notable by a group of concerned Nigerians called “The Save Nigeria Group” both at home and abroad along with many court cases praying President Yar’adua be impeached or his Vice Goodluck Jonathan be empowered. The National Assembly had on February 9th 2010 creatively interpreted one of the clauses of the constitution, in their words in the best interest of the nation and voted to declare Goodluck Jonathan Acting President. This was greeted by much cheers round the world as intent by Nigeria to get a start on the process of nation building at a renewed refreshed pace.

• More failings of President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua emerged as Acting President Goodluck Jonathan was on Tuesday February 16, 2010 elected Chairman of the Economic Community of West African States (ECOWAS) by the group's Heads of State and Government thus extending for another year Nigeria’s leadership. President Umaru Musa Yar’adua had steered the ship of the association for a year until he fell ill, a development which had twice forced the postponement of the 37th Summit of the body.

• On the back of an unpopular decision by erstwhile president Mamadou Tandja to extend his mandate beyond December 2009 having already served two terms a coup d'état occurred in Niger, a country sharing boundaries with Nigeria to the north on the 18th of February 2010. Soldiers attacked the presidential palace in Niamey at midday and captured the President who was chairing a government meeting at the time. Later in the day, the rebels announced on television the formation of a ruling junta, the Supreme Council for the Restoration of Democracy to be headed by squadron leader Salou Djibo.

• On the 22nd of February 2010 members of The Edo State House of Assembly abandoned all sense of decorum as lawmakers purportedly impeached the Speaker, Rt. Hon. Zakawanu Garuba. In what appears to be an inter party strife the erstwhile speaker a member of the ruling People’s Democratic Party has been replaced by Peter Usman Aliu of the AC. Confusion is still the order as the house has not yet sat since the incidence with both members Rt. Hon. Zakawanu Garuba and Rt. Hon. Peter Usman Aliu presently claiming the title of speaker.

• Finally there were one too many alleged political assassinations, reminiscent of a case of kids turning the house upside down in their parent’s absence. The death toll included ex AIT reporter Efenji Efenji (February 14th) and Action Congress gubernatorial candidate in 2007 general election in Ogun State, Otunba Dipo Dina (January 25th, 2010).

When I think of the phrase “a rush of blood to the head” I get into cold play. I think of split decision making…rash decisions taken at the spur of the moment without thinking through the implications. Things one finds oneself doing when one has one’s back against the wall…future regrets.

About a month ago I got my car impounded by the Police for driving on the wrong side of the lane. Yeah I know I messed up but think fuel scarcity and the NNPC Mega Filling Station in Central Area Abuja. I pleaded endlessly in a bid to wear them out to no avail (this technique has been known to work in the past with varying degrees of success as freeing you to get other fishes to fry appears sensible in the long run). They hit back with the “I no go school, I no sabi speak English, go see my Oga” tirade. I refused to give the bribe more so being very broke at the time and had to take in the intimidation, bullshit and all. In the end we headed to the station, I gave my statement, surrendered my keys and particulars and lost my car for the weekend. On Monday after some wait I got my car back without spending a dime through the Intervention of a senior uniformed officer of a parallel body. The car was released out of mutual respect between the officers.

Lesson learnt: One; Patience is a virtue. Two; runaway and live to fight another day. My annoyance at the rude manner in which I was accosted blinded me to the fact that a quick change of gears to reverse at the cock of their guns would have been all that was needed. Three; respect the wealth of experience rich elders. I had to endure being chided while a man to man talk did the trick.

A week or so after that it was the turn of the FRSC (Federal Road Safety Corps) to funk me up. This time I was not at fault per se. a Lady Road Marshal reproved me for intending to make a wrong turn, as I turned to obey her colleague intimidated me and I fell face flat into the trap. I challenged him aggressively for delaying me when I was just about to do right from wrong; he called for me to be dealt with for having the guts to talk back at him, and my attempt to dash away proved futile as I was chased back, baited and my tyre slightly deflated. A hot argument ensued, me being Mr I-know-my-rights and all. In the end I got slammed the monstrous dangerous driving fine for all my troubles.

Lesson learnt: The FRSC are in most cases cunts looking for a scapegoat. Be careful not to fall into their trap no matter how unprofessionally they try to cower you. Dot your Is, cross your Ts and all should be well with you.

Earlier this week being on the receiving end of an ongoing delay tactic and adjournment move I was at the Wuse High Court to witness a landlord-tenant case for my dad; with the only the thanks i got having to sit through a messy divorce hearing. The process was painfully slow as the cross examination of a witness had to be done at snail speed to allow the judge jot down notes as reference material to make for a better understanding of the issue to facilitate judgement. I might have seen too many movie court scenes courtesy Hollywood thus my high expectations were messed up. Could have sworned we would have done better with a shorthand typist or a computer. Funny still is Nigeria ready for the jury concept? Naturally in tune with boredom and hunger my mind wandered. I remembered the case of a bank debtor we had in Jos who took us to court. His statement spawned together with lots of falsehood and bogus claims. With accusing fingers pointed at me as prime aggressor for using the police to shake him up because of his perceived indifference to repaying his long overdue debt.

Lesson learnt: speaking from experience it’s not a crime to be in debt but it’s a crime not to be open about it. Pick your calls and make yourself accessible. Admit your default, explain your situation to your creditor pleading for time and by all means be proactive with a feasibility plan to come good in the shortest time possible. Challenges will eventually pass you by so there’s no need to soil your good name, or give people reason to question your integrity. Guard them jealousy as it may take a lifetime to get them back. Lastly when in disagreement necessarily put yourself in the other person’s shoes before you act. That way you get a holistic view of things with the way out being all the more clear.

Yester night’s win by Kevin Chuwang Pam in the Big Brother Africa 4: The Revolution TV reality show just goes to show the importance of being a people person…people power. There’s no big secret to winning the show or doing well in life. A thousand self improvement books, years of reading the bible or hours of washing your car and keeping it neat is not the secret of excelling in life, it’s simply being likeable. Having a good/kind spirit, being approachable and being able to get on well with everyone you meet. Keeping your cool in all situations and doing to others what you’d want be done on to you. You should be such that when your name is mentioned and the weights are measured people have but positives come to mind. You should be able to hang with the posh, feel at home amongst the poor, kick convo with the religious fanatics and always be a welcomed guest at the house of the neighbourhood whore. Obama is where he is today because we can all virtually relate with him, from Germany to Iran, Tanzania to Peru. Hardly ever booking a nomination without the help of alliances, being swapped 3 times and surviving on all occasions is no mean feat! Sitting in at La Shom Suites Jos amongst friends some of whom schooled with Kev and watching him step out the house with his “JOStified” Tee and the National flag I couldn’t but be prouder. With all due respect in the same vein I would score myself high, my main flaw being some peeps would pass comments about my love for the fairer sex.

Like Kevin, like the Eagles, like the end justified the means. Felt the same way on the evening of the 14th of November sitting down at Steffans amongst my then girl, my man Max and by my far right Mikel Obi’s silver spooned younger bro. as Martins popped in the third goal and we all jumped up in celebrations hugging ourselves I couldn’t but be happier to be Nigerian. The disappointment of September 6th all gone away. When I narrowly missed getting a query for turning into work late the next day; when the Eagles swept the patriotism in all of us to dangerous heights hardly ever been seen before and brought it crashing down at the same speed. I remember how driving around Abuja that night I felt like I was in a soulless city, with a female presenter on Cool FM’s playing of Lighthouse Family’s “high” doing little to raise our spirits. But it’s all changed now, with a visa to Angola and South Africa being the most sought after thing after Yar’dua’s resignation speech.

Wanting a comment from me on the banking issues I’ll only say that we’ve all done dirt like a worm, and that what goes around should come around. P/S: I feel very strongly that we shot ourselves in the foot when we fought against Charles Soludo’s planned currency redenomination. That shit would have done us good on many fronts. Sticking with the flow I remain one of the most avid haters of the Nigerian Police. And having being privileged to work closely with them on that loan recovery front I’ve discovered that attempting to stop corruption in the force is as futile as stopping the next big rapper from America from doing something stupid and going to jail in the footsteps of Mystikal, TI and Lil’ Wayne. Face it, they’re paid a shitty salary, worse still you empower them with the means of force, expectedly they’d abuse it pouring out their frustrations on and trying to augment things via extortion of the good people.

All in all today’s blog post has being brought to you by the words: people and power. Peace!

Finally reading up blog posts which I’ve saved on my laptop for weeks and getting nostalgic made me write this, to just like Matchbox Twenty see how far I’ve come since the last time on TRAE days.

Marketing as a present career niche has been both interesting and boring. Cool when you grow your contacts, meeting all sorts of people and their needs through your product. Boring when at times you run out of ideas and can’t get the itch of a job function change outta ya mind.

Family wise trying to do my bit the best way I can. Pops who’s now fully on ground has gone for another feather; law! Dude’s endless intellectual pursuit is a constant reminder to me not to slack but to get that Masters…and CIBN membership.

I’m still time constrained. Watching TV, leisure reading and getting proper in-house entertainment is still a 9-5 job dream (only realizable on a job that starts at 9 and actually ends at 5).

Loving my crib. Spot’s a real haven, save for my old timer live-in Landlord who locks up by 9. Talk about moving outta home but still living at home. With the curfew in town it's not biting in hard yet.

Regrettable still saving and thinking owning my own car. The current economic downturn truly hit all and sundry. Hope to get there before EOY though.

Ain’t no saint and like Bill Clinton work is work, leisure’s leisure. But got me a stable girlfriend now and really interested in a long thing…“Our” World Cup/Nation’s Cup debut still on my mind.

Romance with the Internet been fuck poor this past year. Visafone 1x in Jos is a far cry to the brilliance of Starcomms 1x/EVDO in Abuja. Funny, reminds me of service complaints as it relates to banks. There’s always a way out though if people’ll wisen up.

Health wise I’m still starving like Marvin. Still ain’t nearing the kitchen on a permanent basis or lifting the irons like I’d love to. Still alive though.

Still aloof politically. Sniffing out the good stuff from the bad…watching from afar.

God bless Nigeria!

Charlie Chaplin - Michael Jackson (in 1979). The mind, humour, knowledge/the Intellectual Property Rights College/.

As written and mailed out to my colleagues on Tuesday, December 30, 2008 at 11:46 am, but with the names edited for privacy:

Like many before me permit me to quote as follows: “ten children cannot play together for ten years”.

This serves to officially inform you of my redeployment to Jos 1 Branch/CMU/CCU as BRC effective Monday 29th December 2008.

It’s needless to say that I’ll miss Makurdi Branch (especially the under listed) but life must go on and I look forward to the greater challenges/new experiences ahead.

My boss MR BAM, you were an excellent tutor, I’m forever grateful to have had the privilege to tap directly from your years of experience.

To my HOP MR HENRY-Team spirited leaders like you are hard to find, keep up the good work sir.

To my mummies MADAM HARRIET and MADAM ABIGAIL-your resilience in a tough working environment is commendable, keep the fire burning.

To my ogas MR MOSES, MR EFOSA, MR AGADA and MR NIYI, I learnt from your wisdom in many ways than one. Thank you.

DIBAL for your military lingua and ABIOLA for your “uniqueness”, thanks for the laughs.

CANDID from UNN to NYSC Batch B 2006 Benue State days all the way to my first 2 months in Makurdi, thanks for being there.

GAFAR, BUSAYO, AGADA O, RAYMOND thanks for the company; MARTHA, IDRIS you won’t be forgotten in a hurry.

ONMA your helpfulness, YINKA your dedication and NONSO NNAM your industriousness is commendable in deed; well done

Thanks for everything, do forgive all my shortcomings. Much peace, love and respect!

Yep it’s all Jos for me going forward. No worries, the Rock city ain’t no Gaza; just experiencing the curfew thing for now.

P/S: if you ever find yourself in Makurdi try and (1) be at the Places and Times Night Club: had my first real regular clubbing experience there. It’s a four point fiver not at all like those bars where you’ll find people staggering in the name of dancing.

(2) Chill out at the Exclusive Lounge wine bar. Great environment; good spot to chill and feel the Makurdi urban and upwardly mobile life style.

(3) Eat at Treaties Buka. I should know, their meals kept me going. But you might want to avoid there when Lobi Stars Club Footballers are guesting. Men and their stomachs…you should understand.

(4) Get around town, taking in the beautiful road network. Much like Abuja, one of the reason I love the place.


Makurdi Branch, the many months of renovation finally paid off.

Banking, the ills: workaholicity and "no time!"

The “I say no time eh!” phrase by top Nigerian ragga artist Timaya best describes my condition in the in last four months, in which time I haven’t blogged (though “no inspiration eh” comes a distant second). Right now at 9.21 am it’s one of those precious weekends for me and as I type this on my generator-powered battery-weakened laptop in Makurdi I await the start of Nigeria’s game against Japan in the on going Olympic men’s football event. So what have I been up to all this while and what’s happened to the time? Here’s what.

I’ve since completed my bank’s ten week entry level training programme in Abuja and have been deployed to Makurdi branch in our North Central Region. Yes, my love affair with Benue State continues having served here (NYSC 2006/2007) and been back shortly afterwards for a short business venture.

Training school was fun no doubt but I also learnt a tremendous lot and had my mind opened to many new perspectives of life. Part of the gains of the training was being able to make my first ever visit to a prison…Kuje Prison Abuja to be precise. Banking being a profession based on trust, integrity is a necessary value and so the visit to the prison apart from its social responsibility import was to show us how low we could sink if we lost our integrity. The funny thing though is that Kuje Prison wasn’t at all like what I expected; it looked more like any well maintained Government boarding house secondary school in Abuja except that the inmates couldn’t leave the area…ever! There were the sober religious type, the ashamed from-a-comfortable-background type but most looked like the average Joe on the street type. Some buildings were recently painted, the compound was neat, there were a lot of new structures and the effect of charitable donations/support from the public/NGOs could be seen. Me thinks that being a population database poor, non safety and security conscious country an escape from the prison would be easy and have the least of consequences. Anyways I digress.

Back to the subject it feels good to be in banking. The opportunities it offers you are endless but the effize of the profession is too much; one could easily get carried away! One could also get “carried away” by the pressures of the job. The demands are heavy so to be on top of ish you’ve got to be sharp and proactively continuously learning. Worse still like I said at the beginning one’s time-crunched! We’ll survive though.

And survival starts with watching my first Dream Team 4 game at the Olympics in a short while. I almost can’t believe I missed their first match…an Eagle’s match!” Work sucks at time! I can believe though that the Abuja Stadium disappointed yet again spectator-wise at the Man U-Portsmouth game a fortnight ago. To the best of my knowledge the only time its stands ever filled up for a football match was The All African Games 2003 u-23 men’s final between Nigeria and Cameroun. As expected a large portion of the crowd got in for free and a much larger portion of the crowd of football lovers in the city just couldn’t be bothered. We shouldn’t loose hair or bother too much to when ever Nigeria goes out of a football tournament. Football is an art not a science and even with the best of preparations one could still falter. Someone’s bound to loose…It ain’t gonna be me though. Ah game time! Excuse me while I do the needful. One!

Happy Customer, Happy Bank. Intercontinental Bank PLC’s (IBPLC) slogan.

In the words of Durella “shout alleluia Papa God e don do am”! Yes oh, I’m now more or less a staff of IBPLC! On Monday I along with over 40 others started a 10 week training (Intensive Orientation Programme) at their Garki II branch in Abuja. We’re what are called Executive Trainees, on that entry level ish; but what’s more it’s all on merit baby!

You see I’ve always loved IBPLC right from when I opened my first real savings account with them in my undergraduate days, so the step up to actually work with them is like on the dream-come-true level. This is how my journey went, it might have been quite long but it definitely was worth it:

1) October 2nd, 2007: submitted my CV to a very close friend who’s in the system already somewhere in Niger State.

2) November 17th 2007: along with over a thousand others I wrote the company’s recruitment aptitude test in Jos, Head Quarters of their North Central region. Rated my chances of making it to the next recruitment stage very high and had fun reconnecting with acquaintances from my NYSC, University and even Secondary school days.

3) January 18th 2008: Had my Interview and medicals along with 71 others in (a bloody cold) Jos. Rated my interview as having gone very well, and meanwhile enjoyed the youthfulness of the environment and the energy floating about.

4) April 21st 2008: after a very lengthy sometimes really crazy wait was finally called to start training/resume work with the bank.

Do you know that I almost completely missed the training save for a very good friend? It's a long story sha. Anyway I know Banking’s not easy and I’ll now be having much less free time and lot’s more commitments but I’m highly positive minded and I’m ready to make every moment count. There are a lot of people I won’t forget in a hurry in my quest for the IBPLC job, I’m unable to name them all at this point in time but from the bottom of my heart I want to sincerely thank you all. Peace, love and respect; one!

The print version of Purple Hibiscus as available at Nu Metro Media store, Ceddi Plaza, Abuja

I recently got paid and so I decided that the right thing to do was to walk into the Nu Metro Media Store at Ceddi Plaza, Central Area Abuja for book and window shopping (the place reeks of affluence; it made me want to grab a gun and shout “stick em up!”). I finally settled with Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s “Purple Hibiscus”, her other book “Half of a yellow Sun” and Sefi Atta’s “Everything Good Will Come”. The 3 books have been ringing in my ears for months now as I‘ve been seeing the buzz about them everywhere I go in the Naija blogosphere.

I’ve just got through Purple Hibiscus and if you asked my opinion I’d say it’s a good book, but I’m somehow not so awed by it. You see to me a great work of art is art that knocks me off my feet that upon consumption I’m like “this is genius! How did the artist manage to do this?” But in the case of Purple Hibiscus I could relate with pretty much everything the author put into her book and I understand where she was coming from characterization wise, that in a good month with the right inspiration and guidance I could well have written the book myself.

She’s a simple crafting-superb product kind of writer, such that I didn’t have much cause to consult a dictionary while reading like I would have bothered with other novels. And she was very minimally descriptive in her writing; she just wanted the story to flow. The book is not exactly autobiographical but reading it I felt as one with all of her experiences she put into writing the book. Detailedly:

1) Via many years of being a read and write freak online I understood the consciousness she put into the characters Obiora, Aunt Ifeoma and Amaka (Although she made Obiora wise above his age. I think it’s very much the exception for kids to be capable of that level of consciousness at that age. Being highly pro-Nigeria I could relate with Amaka’s alternative musical taste and philosophical stance).
2) Having frequently visited my village over the past few years I was happy with her apt depiction of village life in Igbo land and I was impressed by her great love for her Igbo roots.
3) Having had my university education in Nsukka between the year 2000 and 2006 I very much felt at home with the novel.
4) Having witnessed military rule in my awakening teenage years I could very much identify with the plot of the novel.
5) I went to a seminary secondary school but now considering myself a very liberal Catholic I could very much identify with her religious views as painted in the novel.
6) In life I’ve known what it means to be rich, middle income earning and poor, so I understood the extremes painted in the novel.

I’m now off to read “Half of a yellow Sun” and “Everything Good Will Come”. I hope they’ll sooth away my annoyance with Chimamanda for allowing Kambili's mum poison her dad.