Ada Chinedu once upon a time ... Circa 1990

Lost my eldest sister… “Ada Chinedu” as Dad liked to call her on July 30th

Had a seizure and passed away, though she hadn’t been too strong these past few years.

Always was a quiet one, even prior to ill health, not asking for much but giving out a lot when she could.

True she had been occasionally erratic during the same period but one can only function so well at half strength.

Unlike my mum, I feel so bad our last interactions weren’t the most pleasant of memories. Couldn’t give her a ride on July 6th when I briefly visited ABJ. I was raised and self-taught to be extremely great at lending a helping hand (…what more to one of the same blood); and that has never departed me. My hands were tied then…forgive me.

I’m immensely grateful to her for her enormous contribution to my minding amongst a million other stuff. Wouldn’t be me today if she didn’t play her bit.

Thanks for everything; see you on the other side. Adios!

With Chinedu at the Vom Christian Hospital in Jos where she was for a while in 2010.

Someone once said "cherish all of your memories for they are the experiences that mould you”. And rightly so I’ve always been one for mementos; keeping a journal of key dates on my route to recovery post my car accident of July 15th. Glancing at the run down I’m ultimately filled with gratitude and just thought to share. Everyone’s rehab is not the same but this might just come in handy for someone someday.

A-July 15th 2012. Driving a Mitsubishi L200 pick-up truck I survived a head on collision road accident with an empty tank truck. The fallouts were a comminuted fracture in the mid segment of my right femur (thigh bone), a transverse fracture around my left ulna (left wrist) and sixth nerve palsy in my left eye.

B-July 19th 2012. Had surgeries for my fractures. Intramedullary rod inserted into the femur and external fixation done for the wrist.

C-August 2nd 2012. External fixation removed from the wrist and replaced with orthopedic cast (plaster of paris cast…POP).

D-August 6th 2012. Discharged from the hospital in a wheel chair as my left wrist was too weak to use crutches.

E-September 10th 2012. Orthopedic cast (POP) removed.

F-September 17th 2012. CT scan of the head done and first appointment with an Ophthalmologist. Siddon look approach adopted for the eye.

G-September 19th 2012. Started noticing greater flexibility in my left wrist. I.e.: started feeling like I had two hands again.

H-October 19th 2012. Dumped the wheelchair and started using crutches. Injured right leg suspended and hopping on the good left leg.

I-October 21st 2012. Confirmed the sixth nerve palsy 95% gone and vision almost back to normal.

J-November 17th 2012. Stopped hopping on crutches and started partial weight bearing on my right foot.

K-December 7th 2012. 3 days post first physiotherapy session. Started using only a single crutch.

L-December 14th 2012. Dropped crutches all together and started walking unaided; though limping.

I now hope to stop limping in the coming weeks as the muscles in the right leg strengthen. So a time cap would be that recovery took six months. But complete recovery with running and a return to full physical fitness post the accident usually takes anywhere between 12 to 18 months. Insha Allah 2013 is definitely the year for me though. Peace and be inspired!

December 9th 2012. Feeling on the sexy steering; first test drive since my accident.

Update:
M-January 6th 2013. Right leg started feeling normal again, limping drastically reduced and mobility almost as before.

I think I’ll start off this article here.

Gennaro Gattuso had been experiencing vision problems in early September 2011, a few days before the season kicked off. On 9 September 2011, Gattuso clashed with team-mate Alessandro Nesta whilst playing against Lazio in AC Milan's opening Serie A game of the 2011-12 season. He was substituted off directly afterwards (in the 20th minute) and diagnosed with paralysis of the sixth cranial nerve, resulting in diplopia in Gattuso's left eye. He later revealed that he had seen team-mate Zlatan Ibrahimovic in four different positions during the opening stages of the match, and was unable to see Nesta, resulting in the pair's clash. The condition kept him out of most of the 2011/2012 season but he has since gone on (June 2012 precisely) to agree a two-year deal with Swiss side FC Sion.

Sixth nerve palsy, or abducens nerve palsy, is a disorder associated with dysfunction of cranial nerve VI (the abducens nerve). It’s a weakness of the sixth nerve, the nerve that innervates the lateral rectus muscle that pulls the eye away from the nose. When this nerve is weak, the eye turns inward toward the nose (esotropia) and can't look outwards towards the ears; it may turn inward when people look straight ahead. Double vision (diplopia) is the most common symptom, producing a side-by-side image with both eyes open. Such people usually engage in head-turns to maintain binocularity and binocular fusion and to minimize diplopia.

Multiple events can cause sixth nerve palsy; head trauma being one of such events. The amount of resolution of 6th cranial nerve palsy primarily depends on the cause. Most cases improve within three months after onset and many resolve by six months. Temporary solutions might include an eye patch or use of prism eyeglasses. After observation for improvement (usually six months) surgery can be performed to maximize eye alignment.

Yes friends apart from multiple fractures this is what I had to deal with in my left eye following my motor accident of 15th July 2012. Take a look at the picture below taken on August 6th the day I was discharged from the hospital to see what I mean.

I was taken to Lagos for a checkup about a month ago and my consultations with the doctor confirmed most of the stuff I’d already researched online. I was told I should be good in 6 months or less. And now three months down the line from July 15th I’m happy to announce that in my estimations I’m about 90% done with the disorder.

Yes as I like to say I’m a lucky bastard; all the fallouts of my accident were non devastating. More so in my case my employers were supportive and put me on sick leave, so I spent my time rejuvenating and waiting on my fractures to heal. Thus preventing me from running mad as you might do if sixth nerve palsy besets you while you’re in perfectly good health and in the course of accomplishing your dreams. Yes I didn’t run mad, I handled it like it was one of Tom’s Scavo numerous fads on Desperate Housewives that was bound to go someday.

I’m just grateful to God for this day. All the time I’d have to close my left eye so I could read stuff properly on my laptop screen or generally when I wanted to focus. Or all those times I couldn’t look people properly in the face when talking to them as the nasty double vision was taking its’ toll. Or sitting in the car being taking across town to the hospital and everywhere looking crazy in double vision…two by twos. You don’t know what you have until it’s gone. I’m glad to be getting back to my eagle eye excellent vision. Ain’t never use glasses and ain’t never will. Oluwa is fully involved!

Still high off my last post I learnt about this today: “A Love Story in 22 Pictures” and it almost brought tears to my eyes.

It’s a very close reminder of my own situation. Yes, If you could feel how my face felt, you would know how Mase felt/Thank God I ain't too cool for the safe belt/. All other things could be equal…pari passu but having someone to love, spend time with and clean up after you is such a big part of a successful recovery. Great relationships are not a bed of roses, no one knows tomorrow, but even if shit happens, I really do cherish and will continue to cherish this moment. I’m in a safe place right now. Yes, she was with me before the deal, she’s been trying to be mine/she a Delta so she been throwing that Dynasty sign/.

Luckiest man on earth with the loveliest gem to be unearth. 30.09.12.

Kanye West’s debut album “The College Dropout” is one of my all time favourite rap albums. And now more than ever before Kanye’s life inspires me. “Through the wire” being key. I can see a bit of my life in some of him. From dropping out of school, being a struggling producer, surviving a bad car crash, getting signed to a major label and staying relevant for almost a decade in the rap scene; that’s history right there. Yes, this was just a small post dedicated to her…The best I’ve ever had. That’s all folks.

But I can't complain what the accident did to my left eye/
Cause look what an accident did to Left Eye/
First Aaliyah now Romeo must die?/
I know I got angels watching me from the other side/

Kanye West in “never let me down” featuring Jay-Z from the album “The College Dropout”

My accidented truck

In the light of satirical writer Elnathan John’s latest piece "How to survive a road accident" (available here) I decided to work up my injured wrist, summon whatever little writing skill I had left and pen this…or is it type this. This part of the essay particularly inspired me: “This is how to survive a road accident in Nigeria: Pray. Pray that someone with quick thinking and hospital contacts runs into you. Do not expect the police to know what to do. Do not expect emergency services. Just pray.”

Some four years back living the fresh graduate dream of working as a banker I would probably agree with you that I was in a tasking profession and that finding time to do anything on this job was a miracle and as such Friday nights and weekends were heaven. But two months back, July 14th 2012 to be precise I would probably tell you that working in sales in FMCG was second only to sitting in GEJ’s hot seat as commander in chief. I was up late into the night, continuing early the next morning finishing a report whose submission deadline had just expired. I slept at Ade’s for company and to take advantage of his stand by generator. The next morning Sunday the 15th I loaded up my MP3 player with songs to help me get by the long journey, dashed home to get some gear and hit the road for a 5 hour trip (to and fro though). The company was about to launch the redesigned Star bottle and we had to redistribute the old Star stocked in a warehouse in a neighbouring town to ensure quick depletion before the planned new launch. With my boss and 2 colleagues of mine we were to drive in a convoy, but sensing they weren’t yet ready I passed by our meet up spot and hit the road early so I could make it back by midday to do other stuff.

And that was all I remembered. Word was that 45 minutes into my journey I had a head on collision with an empty fuel tanker. Being the careful driver I’ve always been I’m still stunned as to how that ever happened. The good or great thing though is that like Elnathan advised the lines fell unto me in pleasant places. After I left Boss and my colleagues followed me up shortly. At my accident scene the typical Naija crowd was forming with shouts of “mo gbe” and all what not but no one really doing anything. Boss soon caught up with me, dialed his hospital contacts prepping them for my arrival, lifted me up into his passenger seat with me clutching my broken wrist and sped the 45 minutes or so journey back to Ilorin.

Two months later, many plates of food from Boss wife after, and visits, love and care from family and friends I’m sitting at home. Luckily having to contend only with a fracture at the left wrist and right femur, and six nerve palsy in my left eye. How I survived it all I don’t know, I’m God’s son. But working for a great company, generous enough to put me on 4 months sick leave, expend on me and transport me to Lagos for a checkup is definitely a saving grace. To top it all up like Lisa’s Dad exclaimed in “Coming to America” I really did do it this time; I hit the jackpot. I couldn’t have come thus far without my girlfriend AyoB catering to me all the way. Always knew she was the complete package right from the start but if I ever did need any confirmation I’ve gotten it. My Chukwuemeka Ike Toads for Supper inter-tribal dreams are coming true. And so now you know the answer to the question "who do I want to spend the rest of my life with".

I’m sure that like me you’re tired of my lamentations, but hey what can I do, it’s what it is right now. After several laziness and career thinking bouts I just finished up my eulogy. Couldn’t find the words to rhyme plus my rhyme style wouldn’t even be appropriate (ask the 8 Mile Eminem and Retired blogger Delot, it’s hard work) so I settled with this prose. Amusingly it’s kind of like a combination of my last two posts, hope it doesn’t get y’all down. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you, you and you. I see us doing big things this year…always look at the bright side of life. Oya chop knuckle now...one!

Seriously Missing You; Eulogy to my Darling Mother
It came as a wicked shock to me on December 16th 2006, that mum, you who had been all to me, had a day before passed away. I arrived from Benue that day in high spirits, happy to be free from NYSC issues and really looking forward to the holidays and to showing you the man that I’ve become. Only to be greeted by the sight of throngs of sympathizers and your condolence register. Mum it was utterly surreal grasping the reality that I had been 24 hours too late.

My thoughts wandered all over the place. It was agonizing realising that our phone call three days before would be the last I would hear from you. And that our parting seven weeks earlier (an occasion on which you had given me some sober motherly advice) was to be the last I was to see of you.

When I remember all you suffered for me, the love and care shown to me since birth and all our mother-son conversations I seriously regret every single moment I spent arguing and quarrelling with you and just wish I could turn back the hands of time to take care of you as you did to me.

It’s so unfortunate that one as gentle as you would pass away in a car crash. I really miss you mum, I’ve cried out all the tears in me to the point I’m now crying inside. But being mere pawns in the hand of the creator I’m resigned to the fact that God knows best.

Mum you raised me well, and having my siblings and father to weather the storm with I’m sure that as you live through me I’ll always do you proud. I love you mum.

Your son, Tochukwu (TRAE)

Just came back from Benue…hoping to get back into ABJ life, the election fever and blogging (got loads on my mind). But I guess stuff is going to be different now. Lost my mum yesterday…car accident…just finding out…God knows best. I’ll miss you ma…

Edit (20th December, 2006)

I just want to say thanks and God bless to all (online and offline) who commiserated with me on the death of my mum; It sure did mean a lot to me. Her passing away came as a shock to me and I’m still grieving but life ain’t over and I still have to air out this little blog bits which have been in mind for long.

You know how some people think that when you’re born your destiny is already mapped out by God, well I object to that. I think God creates us and gives us the freewill to do as we please. Right or wrong it’s our choice, determined by whom or what influences us. God just sits back and watches the show and intervenes when he wants to or is called upon too. God finishing homework on our fate before hand, I don’t subscribe too…that would probably bore him out.

Still on destiny, I don’t subscribe to the thought that we have only one true life partner and thus won’t get the best out of life except it’s with that person. That’s small mindedness. I believe God gives us the freedom to choose from a range of people who are compatible with us, and all things being equal we can blossom with any of them. This is evident from your past really great relationships; it’s just a pity that they didn’t work. There’s always hope of another for the widow, widower or broken-hearted.

Talk about displeasures and men who give all the attention to the girl (ogle) when both sexes are before them comes to mind. The scene in the Mayor’s office in the film: Barbershop 2 is a good example of this. Yeah I know of the opposite attraction thing but hey this is a meeting of three not a dinner date of two. Such men probably had it tough growing up and thus can’t win girls fair and square without the use of the executive shine.

Ironic instances: lepa (slim) girls who fuss over food. "TRAE you’re lazy, you ain’t doing enough work…TRAE all you do is eat…TRAE don’t finish the food oh…TRAE I’m hungry stop disturbing me". Funny thing is unlike Eldee of the Trybesmen I eat well but I ain’t fat, I work hard and enjoy my meal hard; but they work loads yet have little appetites. Quite unfair don’t you think? Anyways there were always wonders in life.

Last word: many “mum” and “missing you” songs exist; the lyrics are often too theatrical but no doubt about it I sure do miss my mum…she went too soon.

Job is done, raising ghetto kids in the hood/
You was my strength to carry on and now I'm good/
Job well done, you live through your sons and your grandchildren/
Jesus finally got his bride, mummy dance with him/… (From the song “dance” by Nas)